Diversion Required

I am currently pimping this video, which features my friend Rob getting kicked in the balls and girl-on-girl kissing, so is at least a bit diverting.

It's for a competition where the one with the most views wins, so please view it.

I would like to stress that I had next to nothing to do with it. I was moving house at the time.

Well there's my story Teeth on the iPlayer - http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b00d4f0j

Haha, I know you've already listened........

you're rubbish drew!

but your story was both diverting and entertaining

x

Put pink snow on a moon of neptune into youtube. I won't spoil it for you.

my word gerard mckeown - i was sufficiently diverted by that!

http://blog.360.yahoo.com/blog-.qtJYXA8eqhltjrW6Xuq.KvKoh4OE6UF

see if you meet these requirements to be this man's wife

personally i think you might have a potty mouth, which is one of his many turn offs

well he is such a charmer it's really a wonder that he hasn't been snapped up already!

you didn't meet the requirements? :-( what did you fail on? i thought you were a dead cert ;-)

it was the potty mouth wasn't it!

God, I must be bored-just read all of that lovely fella's amazing wife quest. The only thing that wasn't surprising about it was that he is a software engineer...

OI!

software engineers need love too!!

Shucks – I’m disqualified – so he says I'm NOT allowed to fall in love with him. Bugger. Is BDSM a driving school?

~
www.fabulousmother.co.uk

Ha-sorry Dan, didn't mean to out you...

i think i am perfectly suited to him ... i think i might be in love with him already

not dan ... i mean the other fella ...

tho dan IS very lovely

I think he's mississippi.

gulp

Haha-George's ad would so much briefer!!!

As would mine-

Can you spell?
Do you weigh less than me?
Are you fairly wealthy and not that good at tracking your bank acount transactions?

See, much simpler.

is spelling really such a big issue?

what about correct use of apostrophes?

well I see that as a subset of spelling but am more liberal on it as I often get it wrong myself...

what about typos?

or people with dyslexia?

My last two girlfriends were dyslexic (or so they said as soon as I said I was intolerant of poor spelling).

Typos aer jsut neo fo thseo tnhgi htat ahppne

something was bothering me about the wife hunter ... that business of only going to the loo once on a date ...

Maybe he'll allow one visit for peeing and one for taking Class A substances to get you through his company that evening-can't say fairer than that?

the timing of the loo visit is crucial, as is the ability to walk without eating and drinking

so he wants a submissive camel with a giant bladder?

I saw a submissive camel with giant bladder on ebay just the other day-buyer collects.

will you mail him or shall I?

i think you have to send a photo first - as proof positive - i'm not sure what sort of hair he specifies ...

Yeah, problem is, he also specifies breasts no larger than 36C and you know, it is a camel and he will get confused won't he?

we could get one of those minimiser bras and fit it on the humps?

Ah, but camels are vegetarian - you'd have to convince it to wear the bra AND eat the occasional burger.

~
www.fabulousmother.co.uk

"Making the camel eat a burger" sounds like the most disgusting euphemism....

maybe a goat would be better

Goats – skinny, small boobs, will eat anything, sure. But you’d never get it to do the submissive thing. Gobby buggers, goats.

~
www.fabulousmother.co.uk

i am beginning to see why this quest is so problematic ...