Chapter 1 - Morning.

Even with my eyes closed, i knew i was still tired.
“Ash, c’mon get up, its your first day” came Carrie’s familiar voice.
“You don’t want to be late” she added. I rolled over in bed wanting to go back to sleep but she was right, I didn’t want to be late. Today is the first day back at school for the new year and i promised myself that since next year was my last year at school. This year, i guess, was pretty important. I swung my feet over the side of the bed and they landed hard on the cold wood floor, i stared out the window a second before getting up t, i needed to check the weather but my curtains were closed. I walked over to the window and pulled the rough lace aside. Good, i thought to myself there were no clouds and the sun didn’t look too hot either.

“Come in here for a second will you Ash” Carrie yelled. Ehh want now, i thought to myself, but followed the voice to the kitchen nevertheless.

Carrie was sitting at the kitchen table when i got there, she was wearing a black dress I’d never seen before, her faded blond hair was pulled into a tight bun at the back of her head and her face was layered in makeup. Her head was tilted to the side holding a phone between her ear and her shoulder.
“Yes mum?” I said. I wasn’t allowed to call her Carrie to her face. She looked up at me, raised her hand in the air to gesture that she was busy and that i should wait and continued chatting. Well you called me in here i thought to myself as i headed for the pantry and grabbed the coco-pops.
“Ash no, don’t eat that rubbish i already made you breakfast” lily blurted as she reached her arm around to the bench, while hmm-ing and ahh-ing into the phone and grabbed a bowl of fruit salad placing it in front of me. It looked half-decent so sat down to eat
.
“Thanks Deb, I’ll get back to you soon.” Replied Carrie before hanging up.
“So don’t forget you’ve got that audition today for that show”. Dam, i had forgotten about that, I thought i was going to have a free afternoon
“Oh yeah sure, looking forward to it” I lied. I hadn’t looked forward to anything to do with modelling for months, to be honest I’ve sort of wanted to quit, but it’s not that easy, i don’t think I’d ever be able to do that to mum.
“Oh and I’ve brought you a new pair of jeans for school, they are really nice” she exclaimed. I didn’t really care much for nice things, but i didn’t complain as she passed the folded pair over. I placed them next to me and continued eating.

I sat in silence for a few minutes while she made another call, then i wandered upstairs with the jeans to get ready. I got dressed pairing the jeans with a plain white tee and my black cons. They looked shabby compared to my new jeans but I didn’t care. I finished getting ready, washed my face, brushed my teeth, and pulled my long hair into a ponytail, I didn’t bother with any makeup.

I swung my backpack over my shoulder and rushed down the stairs. I was about to walk out the door when i heard Carrie yell
“Come get your lunch”
That’s strange, she hasn’t made me lunch in years. I was in a hurry so I stepped into the kitchen quickly grabbed the brown paper back and rushed out the door, yelling goodbye but not waiting for any reply.

I fiddled around in the front pocket of my bag for my iPod while walking down the path to the front gate. I lived in a nice house I guess, it looked really big from the outside. Funny how you could feel so trapped when you were in it. Not trapped in the house exactly more trapped inside yourself.