My street is much bigger today
the trees replaced with traffic lights
I feel incongruous
like a texting pensioner
Grown men with simpering goatees
fly by on imported skateboards
there is no grass, no fizz
of photosynthesis
Three kebab shops in a row
throw salad at my feet
I feel uncomfortably holy
as I slide through tomato debris
I am far from any sort of home
but this is my street now.
Comments
littleditty | February 29, 2008 - 19:45
this connects - the story because i can relate, sure most people can, and because of the lead in, 'incongruous' sets up the tension, and interesting snippet details follow - like the last two lines - really good, enjoyed :o)
Sooz006 | March 1, 2008 - 16:36
The last two lines are fantastic. And yes, I remember grass before it became a combustible.
barely black francis | March 3, 2008 - 15:23
Thank you both. Not written much recently, so it good to get some positive feedback.
tamara (not verified) | March 11, 2008 - 14:38
Tamara I can almost feel like I'm in this street,excellently expressive,Bravo!