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Re-birth

Posted by Beeme on March 5, 2011 - 21:31

I dig my nails
into the soil,
trying to peel
back the layers.
Filling in
gaps of time,
as if you
are the dirt
brown, smudged skin
clinging…
like tissue
or roots.
My fingers
divers
dragging our lake,
feeling for you.

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Comments

Silver Spun Sand | March 6, 2011 - 14:35

Another good one, Beeme. I like the line-breaks; they are effective, especially 'clinging...'

Like the imagery with 'my fingers - scuba divers'.

Enjoyed;-)

Tina

Beeme | March 6, 2011 - 15:56

Thank you Tina, glad you enjoyed this one :)

Beeme xx

MistakenMagic | March 6, 2011 - 16:31

Lovely to see a shorter poem from you, Beeme. There are some beautiful images in this one too! The only thing that jarred with me was the 'scuba' in 'scuba divers' - for some reason it feels a little out of place. Why not simply try it as 'divers' instead?

Magic xxx

Beeme | March 6, 2011 - 20:11

Thank you very much Magic, glad you enjoyed this :) I agree, I've changed it to divers :)

Beeme xxx

fatboy74 | March 6, 2011 - 20:14

Agree with what has been siad Beeme, well done. :-)

Beeme | March 6, 2011 - 20:23

Thank you, so much fatboy :) Glad you liked :)

Beeme xx