No. 4

Did you leave, or were you never here, friend?
How long have I guarded your empty cage?
When I confessed to your shrouded legend
did the void gleefully swallow my age?
Did you judge? Is this only the first trial?
Should I bury my voice? Will you return?
That little which I know is brutal and vile.
Should I purge my soul, pray that I unlearn
that which made me frail? Alone and waiting,
should I hate myself for every day lost,
as I do, slander all that I begin
pray that I may change and depose remorse?
This plague cannot replace you, yet what might?
I could trap you anew but for hindsight.