When you go to see your local practice doctor
A “jack of all trades” or general practitioner
And it’s not obvious what it is that’s ailing you
The doctor will plump for a new stain of flu
Perhaps after a cursory examination of a joint
A prescription for some preparation to anoint
Or after writing something illegible in your file
They will suggest that you join a gym for a while
Or after an examination of your chest or throat
A prescription for some linctus will get his vote
Though more likely the solution to your choking
Will be for you to immediately give up smoking
Now no matter what ails you one thing is clear
One of the things that you are guaranteed to hear
As they talk down to you saying “don’t make a fuss”
Its nothing to worry about at all its just a virus
