A QUESTION OF SPORT


from the ABC set THIS SPORTING LIFE

WINE DOWN UNDER

Don’t buy any Australian wine’s next year
Because since they lost the world cup I fear
When we knocked them off their ivory tower
All of their grapes have suddenly gone sour

CAN’T PLAY AWAY

The eternal problems for all football teams
Was keeping players fit to fulfill their dreams
As with unfit players they were bound to fail
But today the problem is keeping them out of jail

WITCHFINDER

Witchcraft abounds
In Wimbledon
This is a conclusion
That’s forgone
And there are witches
Everywhere
See if you can spot one
If you dare
Agassi is one and
That Tim’s a witch
And then there’s Goran
Even e’s a vitch

SPORTY WIFE

Now I keep telling my wife
No matter what she may have thought
In no way shape or form
Can shopping be considered a sport

IN OR OUT OF SYNCH

If a synchronized swimmer
Were to drown
Would the rest of the team
Also go down?

OPEN TOUR

Why do they call it
The tourist season
If shooting at them
Is not allowed then

IT'S ONLY A GAME

"It's only a game,” they might say
It’s not a life and death thing
No one ever says, "It's only a game"
When their team is winning.

YOU’LL LIKE THIS

Something that may get you in a fix
Is demonstrating fancy card tricks
For more than one serious gambler
Just before you’re about to play poker

WINNING HAND

When you’re playing poker
I think it’s true in all cases
That a Smith and Wesson
Will always beat four aces

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