You know you drink too much coffee when
You can sleep with your eyes wide open
When you can ski uphill on your snowboard
And you have to watch videos in fast-forward
You know you drank too many coffees
When your eyes stay open when you sneeze
You speed walk in your sleep till six o’clock
You answer the door before people knock
You know you're drinking too much caffeine
When you like to lick the coffeepot clean
If you haven't blinked since the last eclipse
And you chew on other people's fingertips
