OK Alone

Posted by crush on October 6, 2007 - 13:48

Someone invites you, a drink
their house for seven and you take it
there'll be cocktails, a tray
with olives - not your thing but
a dip for the pits, Mexican ware.
You'll be lost, like you are these days
you used to be better at these
things, wiser - you
made people laugh - and then lost it.
Later you'll go out the two of you
you'll wonder how you ever felt
like yourself with people.
These clothes won't feel like yours
there will be others laughing
and you won't get the jokes.
There will be a table, lights, wine
and you'll wonder how to connect.
You used to be wired in, you really did.
You've taken to talking
to someone who's gone. Moved on.
Lips moving when you drive, proper
conversation. At traffic lights you
tap the wheel, pretend to be singing
in case someone's looking.
Walk your thumb around the steering wheel
in little steps, bending the knuckle
thinking that it gives like flesh.
It can't be that you're only ok alone.

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Comments

I really related to this ... the feeling of estrangement and un-connectedness... loved the steering wheel / driving details, and also at the beginning of the poem, the description of the cocktail party. Thank you. S.P.D.

Great poem and something that most will hope not to be doing unknowingly - being alone and talking to one's self. The 'you' point of view has real impact - almost as if the finger is pointing at me - the reader...

I'm on a writing journey and have moulted a few times along the way. At this present time I'm a chrysalis awaiting a metamorphosis

Thanks for the comments.

anipani says:
this hit raw spots, i guess being on your own is a place i often prefer to be, i have always felt slightly guilty about that! and i am old enough to know better. writing that resonates, great.

Daffni
Cymru am byth
http://www.meirionnydd.f9.co.uk

Spot on description. Very perceptive.
Most of the time these days I like being alone but that took me back to when I didn't.

Good writing, lots of imagery. A nice descriptive tour around your emotions. Richard LP