Simon Cowell: A retrospective.

Mental music. You need it because otherwise you would be listening to shit and liking it; your species has provided you with no better. Musicians have ever been the bane of those who seek to sell music. There is secret footage of Simon Cowell suggesting that Christian bonfires need to return but instead of witches and homosexuals it's the musicians that need to be burnt this time. Simon Cowell is grooming a young boy into another Justin Beiber. It is claimed that he has a shed in which he houses a pre-pubescent boy producing woman who births them at a rate of two a year following regular group servicing by Nazi occultists. Humorously linking them to WW2 rape houses, the Joy Divisions, he calls it the 'Boy Division,' and thus Beibers are produced, trained and marketed with a minimum of fuss, cost and human rights intervention. But it doesn't do to hate the Justin Beiber or whatever Cowell decides to name it. In the vintage crime chiller Scream, was the mask the culprit of the crimes or was it the man wearing the mask? You see my point? I myself am not going to slaughter Cowell, as much as he deserves it but should there be any psychos out there finding themselves at a loose end in the future, why not cut off his head and mail it to Justin Beiber? Or maybe some Indonesian or Pacific tribe still carries out the custom of brain eating to cleanse the evil of an individual from the world, send it to them perhaps. Should anybody prove to me that this noble duty has been carried out, I will happily pay them ten pounds plus I will write to the Queen to inform her royal highness of the service that has been provided to the species. She will no doubt want to commend you herself before you are incarcerated at her pleasure. Otherwise music will continue on its downward slope and conclude finally as being merely the musings of a squeaky voiced boy who is undoubtedly the product of an illegal Nazi rape house, but i imagine his mother feels pride in those short moments as one pair of Waffen jodhpurs is hoisted up and the next dropped.