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In Particular Spaces

Posted by Doeslittle on February 28, 2008 - 10:35

Time begins and is the process of all endings,
Built from stones and bricks and mortar,
A clockwork, watchwork world of ticking,
To be awoken and slept by:
Yet consider what occurs to the connection
Between time and your mind at rest,
Whether it can exist outside
Your consciousness of it, before it rings or
Buzzes at you and follows with those acts
Which you have set by it, allotted spaces
To move, think, eat, work.
And there are less tangible aspects:
That dishevel skin and bone,
That lessen pain or love,
And deaden ideals or faith,
That allow for excuses or concede reasons,
That invoke sensations of pace – too quick, too slow,
Or clutched at indiscriminately – too late, too soon,
That makes sense of light and dark or seasons,
And all the chaotic senselessness
Which is better ignored or avoided,
That seems to drift in a magnetic arc
Across the knowledge of some latent understanding
Which could only ultimately unveil
A rebellion of this quiet,
Clinical and thread – like order.

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Comments

Sooz006 | February 28, 2008 - 17:20

Nice one. Not sure I completely 'got it' but enjoyed the flow of it.

Doeslittle | February 28, 2008 - 18:56

Well, all I intended to do really was to question the man made division of time - and explore the fact that it's a construct. The first two lines were meant to be about the fact that as one second ends another begins simultaneously as with minutes and hours and so on. Overall, the idea that time is marching on, to coin a phrase, regardless of whether we divide it into seconds and minutes or not all. In the last few lines I was trying to suggest that even though time is an imposed construct it does make sense out of what might be chaos.

However, I need to think about the fact that people may miss, not necessarily my meaning, but ANY meaning in my poetry. I read great swathes of philosophy and it is often reflected in my poems, but because I have rarely had my poetry read by anyone up until a couple of days ago I'm not certain I've really taken the understanding of others into consideration to any great extent. And perhaps I should! I'm going to try to though I'm not sure I can cure myself of the thoughts and ideas that inspire me!

blackjack-davey | February 28, 2008 - 20:10

I'm interested in the world before the invention of time, the hunter-gatherer who existed in the NOW, the eternal 'live-long' minute. Way before the day was divided up by candles and Books of Hours, the sun and moon had to be propitiated because they weren't reliable.

My only problem with the poem is the line 'in a simultaneous polarity of rational construction..' It feels like a lecture, (or instructions in a washing machine manual). There's an essay bursting out of the poem. That line needs to be dramatized. I like the fact you're interested in ideas and the rest of the poem.

Doeslittle | February 28, 2008 - 20:14

Yeah...it does a bit. In fact...it could lose that line altogether really. I'll think it over.

Doeslittle | February 28, 2008 - 22:58

I decided not to just ditch the line, but tried something else instead. Do let me know what you think Mr Black Jack when you get a chance as it took me half an hour which included a lot of frowning, face pulling and hair twizzling to come up with drama over instruction manual (which the line so does resemble that it made me roar with laughter when I'd read what you'd said). I may keep it though and attempt to scare some students with it on Monday.

Thank you very much for suggesting it - it's hard to see these things yourself sometimes. I'm not sure I'm entirely satisfied with the replacement lines, but maybe they just need bedding in.

blackjack-davey | February 29, 2008 - 00:24

I like and prefer the replacement lines, strong image over abstraction. And you've set the clock ticking much faster. I'm going to reread in the morning when my brain feels let cramped but YES!

Doeslittle | February 29, 2008 - 00:30

Hurrah...and having noticed that it's late by moon gazing I'm going to bed for brain loosening too.