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Totality

Posted by emg32 on May 22, 2009 - 20:00
from the ABC set My Work

I am the trilling water,
pushed forever toward the rock.
I am the heaviness in the kitchen air,
pan-seared and spice-rubbed,
the tongue darting long and short
in a Morse code of desire
around a swirl cone.
I am the ruffled bird hopping
hoping for crumbs,
the acrobat spider
dancing sticky-legged in the eaves
outside my apartment,
the bee whose anger
eviscerates only him;
the barb wounds, but my
guts spill across the flowers.
I am the crying, flying gull,
the scrape of metal shears,
the boom and wake of the stunt jet
overhead that stuns them silent and
gawp-mouthed, and the
shush and sizzle of rain in August.

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Comments

sarah wilson | May 22, 2009 - 20:38

I think this is wonderful I can't pick a line out because it's all great:-)

Sikander | May 22, 2009 - 21:48

Lovely stuff. An amazing mesh of images and sensual delights.
Keep them coming!

emg32 | May 23, 2009 - 03:19

Oh wow. Thank you!

There are a few line breaks I might change...

emg32 | May 23, 2009 - 03:26

And thank you, too. I usually can't remember precisely when and where I write poems, but this one? Was written at my favorite coffee shop right on Lake Michigan...I can tell from the opening line.

One question: Does it flow OK? There are a couple of places within it I feel the line doesn't break on the right word.

anipani | May 23, 2009 - 13:55

Reads beautifullly. Loved the 'shush and sizzle of rain in August' Enjoyed reading this, and reading it again.

emg32 | May 25, 2009 - 16:46

Thank you so much for the feedback; it helps so much!