The Man In Front

It was all rather shocking. I went to the Spar -
and - are you prepared for this dear?
It might take you aback somewhat.
Well, I was aghast. The queue dear,

stretched back to the biscuit selections
past the crisps, the bags of sweets,
the chocolate and the boxes of tea.
It was the talk of the shop.

Something ghastly happened.
You see everyone was using
those plastic-card things.
I shouldn’t complain.

I was too. But, it does make
The situation worse perhaps.
Well, you see I couldn’t help it,
they had lots of signs up,

with THREE-FOR-TWO!!! offers
so I got you some Beuno.
I know they’re your favourite.
But the hazelnut galaxy

Had 50% EXTRA FREE!!!
So I swapped it.
Then the prawn cocktails
were TWO-FOR-THE-PRICE-OF-ONE!!!

So, well - what I’m trying to say
is I spent more than we expected -
But, are you listening dear?
They handed me the reciept

then the man in front shot himself.