Musically Useless (For Caldwell) 11th June 2008, 10.27pm)
She turns the radio off
and silence flows around me,
heavy with expectation;
the air is listening,
waiting to be rent,
giving its permission;
from the kitchen
she calls, ‘Get on with it!’,
impatiently chopping
capsicums for chilli,
expecting me to entertain her
until ‘The Archers’ comes on
at five past seven;
I have twenty minutes
that stretch out like
languid cats
basking in sunlight.
I run my fingers up the keys;
I run my eyes over the notes;
I practise a few scales,
Pretend I’m warming up;
‘Play a piece!’
What peace do I get?
You never learnt an instrument,
and I will make up for it.
The notes will not behave,
my fingers crave the reins,
leather and not ivory,
galloping in the rain,
one with the horse and free
graceful and at ease;
I can play that horse’s paces
in ways I will never master keys.
Mozart is turning over;
Beethoven thanks the Lord that he’s still deaf;
Chopsticks isn’t Chinese,
and unless I conquer
Fleur de Lys,
I’m being sent to bed.
Ten years later,
You make me cry
by selling my piano
without asking me.
The lounge stands, silent,
an empty space,
filled with expectation
and air that’s still
listening
and wincing.
Comments
Doeslittle | June 11, 2008 - 21:29
This is fantastic, and fantastically fast again.
jennifer | June 11, 2008 - 21:31
Heavens, have literally just spewed this out after reading Caldwell's 'Musically Ungifted', which is actually my story. So it is totally indebted to him!
So it's him the thanks should go...
Caldwell | June 11, 2008 - 21:38
No, leave me out of it, this is great. Except might I question... Should lanquid be languid?
Caldwell | June 11, 2008 - 21:40
I love that bit
‘Play a piece!’
What peace do I get?
Brill
jennifer | June 11, 2008 - 21:55
Yes, it should be. My eyes are tired, my fingers aren't any better at manipulating computer keyboards than piano ones and it looked like a 'g' onscreen. Pfft.
And thank you, I like the wordplay there too!
Dynamaso | June 11, 2008 - 23:45
This reminded me of when I was first learning to play guitar and having to sit in front of my music stand, playing the same boring scales over and over while my mother sat on the lounge reading a magazine and saying "Again," each time I finished a set.
I particularly like the 7th stanza and moreso, the lines
I can play that horse’s paces
in ways I will never master keys.
Wonderful work, Jen.
paperandink | June 12, 2008 - 01:46
Nice use of language here. The emotional content was woven well throughout and I loved the last stanza. Good work making it a glimpse of the life that made you feel as you do. Let's hope you kept on moving along despite. The musical angst of childhood is enough to make us all wish for deafness at times.
sunshine | June 12, 2008 - 20:56
Yes nice play on words and seom sharp phrases. Like the contrariness at the end.
Leonie | June 16, 2008 - 23:49
Beautiful