Seeing you there,
lying beside me,
knowing you are
already miles away.
Wishing you here,
looking inside you,
trying to pull you
away and back now.
Meet you halfway,
seeing the way in,
your soul begins
to drift away,
from me.
Then crying out to you,
every tear of my heart,
every flame of my love,
feeling my heart beat above.
Inside you, feel me
close and holding tight,
my grip is not fading,
listen no distance grow.
Wishing me there,
I want to go with you,
I cannot bear to be left
behind you, alone.
Then I hear you breath,
the sudden gasp & it shakes me,
into a shock, I cry and I can believe
and now hold you gently, knowing.
I should tell you, it can wait.
Comments
Silver Spun Sand | March 21, 2010 - 17:25
This is beautiful, Kahdai. Just a small suggestion with the second stanza, third and fourth lines. It reads much better if you omit the 'all' and if you have an 's' on the end of begin. I.e.:-
'your soul begins
to drift away...'
Enjoyed;-)
Tina xx
MistakenMagic | March 22, 2010 - 16:53
'Meet you halfway,
seeing the way in,
all your soul begin
to drift away,
from me.'
- really love this stanza, Kahdai and that last line is such a beautiful end!
Magic xxx
RachelPatricia | March 22, 2010 - 18:24
really liked this one too, beautifully written
Rachel xx
Kahdai | March 22, 2010 - 19:36
Thank-you Rachel, am glad you like it. I think I will make that change thank you Tina & Magic liking & saving my original version, I love the ending too, not wanting to ruin the moment or wake them. xxx
RachelPatricia | March 22, 2010 - 23:40
you're very welcome :) credit where credit's due :)
Rachel xx