Beaten, Broken. Best.

Beaten down,
On the ground, I lay.
Motionless, and broken.
Screaming to the Earth, this is the end of me. I'm lost.
What is it you gain, from laughing at my pain?
Do you really feel like a man, when you put out your hand,
You help me up, halfway,
To let go and drop me in the mud.
Soaking wet, mixed with my tears that made this puddle flood.
You're pretty proud of yourself, aren't you?
And beating me, is what you came to do.
Blotched face, broken heart.
And my bruised flesh, really show's that you are the best?

Discuss this piece in the abctales forum


Comments

Nathan Bednarek | January 25, 2010 - 00:55

Simple, yet powerful. Please don't take this the wrong way, but at first glance I thought I might not enjoy reading this poem as I thought it'll probably be full of clichés, but even though you use familiar images and scenarios, you manage to capture the emotion in the moment of it being experienced in a unique way. This poem is proof that something simple, yet from the heart is usually more powerful than something complicated, yet cold.

Enjoyed. Well done.

Nathan.

kellytwatfacee | January 25, 2010 - 01:23

Thanks (:
When I was writing it I was kinda angry, I am usually when I write stuff like this.. so I thought it would turn out really bad, but I thought it was okay enough to upload, so yeah, glad you like it (: