Home

Transmutation

Posted by lenchenelf on September 14, 2010 - 23:16
from the ABC set Camera Obscura

You consume raw life in jaw dislocating bites,
chewing slowly like a strange multi-gut herd
of were-friesans, expect us to feed at your udders,
poor orphans we; strain for nourishment or wither.

Gilt edged men of letters, ghost writers of The Word,
you self-perpetuating academic oligarchy,
no hint of matrimonial right of access for adoring public;

we who are wedded to your nonsense, that only a fustydusty
study, creaking hide bound minds of more of your kind
in a cannabilistic rite of passages, some from behind,
could produce inspiration through filtered rumination,
pre-digested, pathogen free, for the likes of we.

----------
minor ed. 15.10.10

Discuss this piece in the abctales forum


Comments

Kilb50 | September 15, 2010 - 11:00

Harrison offers a very good reading of his poem Uz and Them on Youtube. Particularly liked "pathogen free" and the academic "udders"...give me nonsense from the soul any day!

Silver Spun Sand | September 15, 2010 - 11:37

Clever, this!

Enjoyed;-)

Tina

lenchenelf | September 15, 2010 - 12:08

Thank you K50 and Tina, much appreciated :-)

I happened to look up his reading on The Poetry Channel yesterday, it always makes me smile. all the best lena xx

Kahdai | September 15, 2010 - 12:25

I dont really understand this, like it anyway, its wierd :) K

lenchenelf | September 15, 2010 - 13:11

Thanks K, I suppose weird can be interesting :-) atb Lena xx

Kahdai | September 15, 2010 - 13:20

yes it is too!

rjnewlyn | September 16, 2010 - 22:10

I think it works well. I wouldn't want to be on the receiving end of this!

Rob

lenchenelf | September 17, 2010 - 08:12

Thanks Rob, neither would I! Another POV experiment :-) atb lena xx

Kahdai | September 17, 2010 - 20:37

I find it easier to understand now, so like it better, yet not sure what changed! K

lenchenelf | September 18, 2010 - 07:27

Hi K, 3rd stanza,
'wedded to your nonsense'
1st draft included 'your',which I subsequently removed when subbing it here; the draft you commented on.
I decided to edit it back in, plus a couple of minor punctuation changes to make the flow easier to read.
I appreciate it is difficult to follow the edits in a piece, which is why I usually edit date at the bottom of the poem with consideration for those who have read and commented beforehand. On occasion I do leave the 1st draft as a ref point when workshopping a poem.

Thanks for your comments, they are really appreciated.
all the very best Lena xxx

Kahdai | September 19, 2010 - 15:39

Hii Lena, Thats great idea, thanks for explaining! Kahdai xx