Heavy is my world
slowly it spins and turns
grudgingly on tilted axis
Strong determined the winds
that blow among the stars
scattering in panic
frightened whispy clouds
Forceful is the rain
drenching trees, the leaves
mulching up the land
Cold dark is my mind
in this slowly
turning winter world.
Comments
insertponceyfre... | January 18, 2011 - 09:54
perfectly captured bleakness
Louise178 | January 18, 2011 - 09:58
Thank you insert and thank you to the mysterious ABC cherry giver :)
seashore | January 18, 2011 - 10:29
Yes you've said what I would like to say but can't!
SundaysChild | January 18, 2011 - 17:03
Very bleak, very good.
Louise178 | January 18, 2011 - 17:57
Thank you for your lovely comments, sorry it's a bit bleak :)
pat kings | January 18, 2011 - 22:19
paints a picture
JoseHdz | January 18, 2011 - 23:23
bleak is not a bad quality in this poem.. great job!
cheers.
Louise178 | January 19, 2011 - 14:01
Thanks for the comments :)
Beeme | January 19, 2011 - 20:31
Sorry for my late commenting, extremely haunting poem, dark and beautiful :)
Beeme xx
Louise178 | January 20, 2011 - 09:59
Thank you beeme x