Frustrations of furry..
Angelic voices of whispering hymns
Luminious leading light
Lustfully luring me
Enveloping ecstasy
Nutritious nectar nullifing my appetite
Aphethic ailing aspirations
Narrarating the futures path
Gentle breezes of winds
Eventually leading to envy
Love is a confusing emotion
Comments
jennifer | June 14, 2009 - 11:59
In the first line, do you mean 'furry' or 'fury'?
Alliteration is great, but perhaps keep it up throughout the piece for better effect? (Not good at structured poems, I may well be wrong)
J x
pinda | June 14, 2009 - 12:14
Yes,fury.I hate typos.Anyway thanks for the comment no no,don't say you might be wrong.Your feedback is probably one of the best I'm going to get. Anything you rekon is wrong then just holla.
sarah wilson | June 14, 2009 - 14:46
I'm enjoying your move into poetry and I liked this a lot, even more when I thought it was furry tho!!
Sarah x
pinda | June 14, 2009 - 14:49
Thank you Sarah for your kind words.
x