I cannot stop looking,
the way a castaway looks - hands shielding eyes -
with both hope and despair,
The promise of land, distant, yet visible.
I cannot stop imagining claiming that land;
leaning back against the sun baked earth,
solid, constant. Digging my fingers
into the soft silky sand, the long
billowing grasses wrap around me, in a lovers caress.
Trees grow there, laden with love, I pluck the fruits
and eat my fill, until I'm sated, brimful, overflowing, and still I eat
for you can never have too much and there is no end to the supply.
I would map every inch of my island, every hillock and rise,
every valley and dark dripping cave, discover where the water lies
cool and sweet, where the sun first touches at dawn,
where there is shelter from cruel winds and harsh words.
Despite my efforts to reach you
- frantically paddling with raw and blistered hands,
gulping gallon after gallon of salty water,
wishing on every distant mocking star,
praying- through parched lips- to every and any god -
time and tide are against me,
"sorry" you say, watching me drift.
Comments
Highhat | November 14, 2010 - 15:01
Love the metaphors. What a sad poem
:)Pia
Silver Spun Sand | November 14, 2010 - 19:04
As Pia says, the whole poem is crammed full of delicious metaphors...and so very evocative.
Tina
seashore | November 15, 2010 - 15:51
Agree with above - love the ending.
MistakenMagic | November 15, 2010 - 18:04
Simply stunning, Shirley! I love the whole extended metaphor of the island - well done!
Magic xxx
tcook | November 16, 2010 - 13:09
I like this too - but it's visible, not visable!
skinner_jennifer | November 16, 2010 - 16:03
beautiful poem, takes the reader to another place.
Jenny.
shoe | November 16, 2010 - 18:34
Thank you all for your very encouraging comments, I'm really thankful you took time to read and hopefully enjoy!
Thanks Tony, oops, there always seems to be a errant word or two, no matter how careful I am! bought back into line now. Cheers.
fatboy74 | November 18, 2010 - 01:01
Just fabulous Shoe, some startling metaphor. Fab. :-)
shoe | November 18, 2010 - 10:15
Thank you fatboy!! I'm pleased you liked the metaphor,:}
Kahdai | November 18, 2010 - 13:15
aah shoe its lovely and beautiful kind of sad! x K
sue dinum | November 18, 2010 - 22:59
I don't even know what a metaphor is, but metaphors or not your poem gave me a nice feeling, kind of melancholy but still nice. It strange how so many of us like to be made to feel sad, I guess it's a kind of tugging at the heart strings that gets to us.
sue
shoe | November 19, 2010 - 16:54
Thanks Kahdai, pleased you like it, despite of or because of the sadness.
shoe | November 19, 2010 - 17:44
Thank you Sue,
your comment is very thoughtful and much appreciated, It was Tracey Ullman who said "its the poignancy and sadness that gets to me" or something like that, Metaphors? yes I'm learning what they are too... in this case the island is the unavailable lover, I'm not very exact when it comes to stuff like that and get them mixed up all over the place, technical things are not my strong point.
I'm happy that you got something from it.
kheldar | November 30, 2010 - 22:44
Shoe, you never cease to amaze me with your creativity. Another fine piece.
:--) xxx