defences


from the ABC set poems

I’ve stumbled across the line again,
Tripped, stripped, wanting
only to be liked.
Shame burns as ice burns.
I’ll put my trusting self away
Deep down dark inside,
Where there is no price to pay.
She was over-rated anyway.

Discuss this piece in the abctales forum


Comments

kheldar | February 9, 2010 - 17:12

Gritty, to the point, this really stirs the emptions:

shame, bitterness, loss.

Great stuff as usual Shirley,

David xx :--)

shoe | February 9, 2010 - 18:18

Thank you David, much appreciated,:~}xx

Silver Spun Sand | February 10, 2010 - 14:53

David has taken the words right out of my mouth. Another little gem, Shirley and no mistake;-)

Tina x

MistakenMagic | February 10, 2010 - 16:32

Short but very beautiful, Shirley! As David said - to the point, but all the better for it ;)

Magic xxx

Cavalcaderl | February 10, 2010 - 20:53

new shoe
Yes" I to agree.
But for lines of
word's I like:
Iv'e stumbled acroos the line again,
Tripped,stripped,wanting
only to be liked.
So complete in a few words.
I often put my foot in it!
expression.
julie x (:-

Kahdai | February 10, 2010 - 21:51

I like how you actually/ pull your trusting self away Deep down dark inside,/ as so many people do and never realize it. Kahdai

shoe | February 11, 2010 - 10:39

Thanks Julie, I do too!

shoe | February 11, 2010 - 10:41

Thank you Kahdai, we are told to trust more aren't we, but this makes us vulnerable, so there is a paradox,:~}

Kahdai | February 16, 2010 - 13:06

Aah paradox! Yes I suppose it is, or atleast a contradiction, like the smiley. K

Chundar | February 17, 2010 - 16:06

A good piece,touches on those moments we all like to forget

shoe | February 18, 2010 - 10:39

Thanks Chundar, yup, we all have 'em!