Sea spray cools the air by the cave on the headland
where they meet at dusk. Lips seek lips. Eyes scan
the beach. Yes. They are alone...
Save for the bird-brained old biddy, with her pitch
by the groyne, who mutters profanities – a length of rope
for her belt. Only … she doesn’t count.
Theirs was a sordid, rushed affair. A house, a mortgage –
two kids apiece. If they could only put the clock back
they’d do things differently next time.
Passion seeks its reward. Claws at zips and buttons,
as on the shingle they rock and they roll
in rhythm to the surf’s rise and fall.
In the afterglow of it all, he lights her cigarette – she his,
as they watch a distant steamship skirt the horizon;
one last lingering kiss at the foot of the cliff.
He sported a trench coat and a bottle-green trilby.
She wore dark glasses and a black, paisley scarf,
yet the night was warm, so very warm.
The bird-brained old biddy, with her pitch by the groyne
mutters, “Dam ‘em all!” Everyone knows, she’s away
with the fairies; a length of rope for her belt.
Their bodies were found at first light – a black scarf
and a trilby. A tragic landslip. Who they were, no one knew.
Save for the bird-brained old biddy, in a pair of dark glasses.
Only … she didn’t count.
Comments
Yutka | March 23, 2009 - 17:30
wow! This is a most wonderful ballad- heartfelt! I think your writing is brilliant!
MistakenMagic | March 23, 2009 - 19:58
What an excellent, haunting piece Tina! I love the repetition of the 'old biddy'. Such a sad tale but brilliantly told. I especially loved;
Passion seeks its reward. Claws at zips and buttons,
as on the shingle they rock and they roll
in rhythm to the surf’s rise and fall.
Magic xxx
hilary west | March 23, 2009 - 22:45
This is very engaging - Enjoyed !
threeleafshamrock | March 24, 2009 - 02:37
Brilliant Tina! It's got all the elements of a good story; passion, intrigue, mystery and a bit of horror for good measure. Great write, enjoyed a lot.
Chris XX
Dynamaso | March 24, 2009 - 05:47
I love the twist at the end of this. The old biddy character is priceless.
a.jay | March 24, 2009 - 09:31
thumbs up from me - great poem
ax
Silver Spun Sand | March 24, 2009 - 17:57
Yutka - nice to hear from you again:-)
Thank you for your words. Much appreciated and I am glad the poem scored - for you at least.
Tina
Silver Spun Sand | March 24, 2009 - 17:58
I had quite a lot of fun with this one and I am pleased that you enjoyed it, Magic.
Thank you for reading ... and again, you picked my favourite part:-)
Tina xxx
Silver Spun Sand | March 24, 2009 - 17:59
Hilary, my thanks to you. Your words meant a lot. Wasn't sure if this one would have appeal. Glad you liked it.
Tina
Silver Spun Sand | March 24, 2009 - 18:00
Chris, thanks.
When I first had the inspiration for this, I had no idea where it would lead me. Funny, how poems (and, indeed, stories) have minds of their own;-)
Glad you enjoyed it.
Tina :-)xx
Silver Spun Sand | March 24, 2009 - 18:03
Dynamaso, thank you. As I said to Chris, I'd no idea what the ending was going to be, when I first started to write this. Somehow it just evolved. And the old biddy? Quite a character, isn't she?:-)
Tina
Silver Spun Sand | March 24, 2009 - 18:04
a.jay - you're a star! Thanks for that, and for reading:-)
tx
Nathan Bednarek | March 25, 2009 - 14:41
'In the afterglow of it all, he lights her cigarette – she his,
as they watch a distant steamship skirt the horizon;
one last lingering kiss at the foot of the cliff.'
Now this I like! Especially the above stanza; it perfectly captures the 'moment' of their relationship. It also reminds me of the last time I had a seaside date ;-) without the smoking though... ;-p
A lovely poem dear Tina, well done.
Nathan xox
Silver Spun Sand | March 25, 2009 - 16:52
Thank you, dear Nathan ... says she wheezing profusely. Now where's my lighter?:-)
Glad you enjoyed it and speaking of seaside dates, mine was in Broadstairs ... in the year dot:-)
Tina