A sea of mundane faces,
sodden, black umbrellas
drift on by and then
she catches my eye.
White bobble-hat
scarf to match –
nose pressed hard
against my window.
Four iced buns she buys –
comes here every week.
Gives me half a crown;
the change, she pops
inside her glove.
I watch her skip outside,
taken by the tide
of pin-striped trousers,
anoraks and faded jeans,
in her white bobble-hat,
scarf and gloves to match.
I put the money in the till –
still warm from her hand
and wave goodbye
to the child I never had.
Comments
jennifer | September 16, 2008 - 15:03
Like this phrasing:
'the tide
of pin-striped trousers
anoraks and faded jeans'
but the stanza lacks punctuation.
Glowing, yet sad.
Nathan Bednarek | September 16, 2008 - 16:28
Beautiful, touching and perfectly crafted (I don’t mind the lack of punctuation in the 4th stanza as it captures the speed and power of the ‘tide’). Great job as always! ;-)
MistakenMagic | September 16, 2008 - 17:13
Ah you've changed the title? Well anyway brilliant poem and I loved the imagery of a busy high street and that one girl stands out. Reminiscent of the girl in the red coat from Schindler's list, for me anyway :)
Silver Spun Sand | September 16, 2008 - 17:17
Jennifer - thank you so much. I agree and have amended it.
Much appreciate your reading and for taking the trouble to comment, so thoughtfully.
Tina:-)
Silver Spun Sand | September 16, 2008 - 17:21
Nathan - thank you. Your encouragement means a lot and I really appreciate it. Glad it hit the right spot for you;-)
Tina
Silver Spun Sand | September 16, 2008 - 17:25
You don't miss a thing, do you Magic? You are spot on, of course. Friday's Child was its original title and I thought I changed it before I'd posted it, but I guess, by that time, I'd had one too many gin and tonics;-)
Schindler's list, quite a film and the image of that little girl in the red coat - haunting. The music too, blows me away.
My thanks to you for reading and I'm pleased that you found it evocative.
Tina:-)