The warehouse on the wharf
where we used to take our stroll
long-since burned down.
In its place, a trendy restaurant
come café, but the city walls survive
and the path we walked by the Dee
hasn’t changed. On its banks,
silver-birch, ash, horse-chestnut trees
still thrive – etched in charcoal
on a water-colour sky. And the clock
on the church strikes every quarter
and each hour, as it always did.
I throw a pebble in the river, but
unlike you, I can’t make it skim
and in the field, where the cows
used to be – brand new apartments;
windows glint – catch my eye.
As did your smile, the last time
I saw you...in that uniform, so smart;
cap in hand, swinging on the gate
as you opened it for me. Yet today,
I toss our dreams to the wind...
and watch your green beret
float on down to the sea.
Comments
Cavalcaderl | January 13, 2011 - 21:53
new Silver-Spun-Sand
Another little gem,
full of images and colour
and memoirs.I should think.
Thoroughly enjoyed.
Poured hard yesterday and foggy?
julie xx
Silver Spun Sand | January 13, 2011 - 21:59
Glad you enjoyed, Julie. Lots of memories...and lots of rain, especially tonight;-) Your comment cheered me up though. Thank you.
Tina xx
SundaysChild | January 13, 2011 - 22:01
Oh so poignant. You really do paint beautiful pictures with your words x
Silver Spun Sand | January 13, 2011 - 22:08
Thank you, so very much, SundaysChild;-)
Tina x
Highhat | January 13, 2011 - 22:42
I was just about to say exactly what SundaysChild did. You paint some beautiful pictures Tina. Well done. I bet your paintings are just as good !!
;)Pia
sue dinum | January 13, 2011 - 23:09
Poignant and thought-provoking as usual, Tina, and so rich in imagery. Well done!
sue
Cavalcaderl | January 13, 2011 - 23:24
new Silver-Spun-Sand
Thanks missed you last night.
~Gippy stomache then washed up the tap sprays out
over the bowl china full up soaked didn;t help.
So strange I told you about butter patts;and Blighter
rock told story on kind of uterly butterly,we in stitches.I put on some comments,you said keep up butter patts; and the pen,Cherry! quickest ever.Thanks.
Fab;evening.Apart from Gatwick,tanoy gave out
suitcase dropped in front of train,so closed my
eyes,and inwardly prayed,passengers be safe and get
the train moving.within minutes Tanoy message,it is not as bad as thought,train is moving on.Do you need cheering up then had day in bed,got home at mid-night.Sure your a great painter,someone next train Victoria four seats we sat,sketching can I sse,brill;
ends up did poems,said of AbcTales and had coupld copies on me,heading,greatly interested.The cat in rain bless his heart,out called him,came in miaow miaow must got shut out, till we went bed,put him out.Well it was foggy start off.
Hope your feel brighter soon.Met so many like Tony said,round the tables names didn;t fit users name really funny,what I thought? Shop open till 8,30pm
so got souveneir daughter before found "Wheatsheaf"
couldn't got there without Ray.
But Oxford Street,walked so fast lost him I panic,as
got train pass and bus pass,but appeared I shouted
for him.Underground changing crowding,me and mad said
move over please,as nearly went on tracks daft?
take care
julie xx
fatboy74 | January 13, 2011 - 23:43
Just very, very good, agree with all the praise Tina. :-)
Silver Spun Sand | January 14, 2011 - 08:03
I love painting, but am not very good...maybe I should just stick to writing;-) Glad you enjoyed this one and thanks for telling me.
Tina
Silver Spun Sand | January 14, 2011 - 08:04
Thanks, sue. Much appreciated;-)
Tina
Silver Spun Sand | January 14, 2011 - 08:06
Julie, I am so pleased you got back safely. Sorry I couldn't make it. Maybe next time;-)
Thanks for reading this one, glad you enjoyed;-)
Tina xx
Silver Spun Sand | January 14, 2011 - 08:06
Many thanks, fb. Pleased you liked;-)
Tina
skinner_jennifer | January 14, 2011 - 09:59
Hi Tina,
I too loved this poem, memories are such a pleasure.
I know what you mean about the buildings you once
remember, I have been on google map, alot of the
places that hold fond memories for me are now gone,
it is such a shame, but then poetry helps us
remember and that is good.
By the way keep painting, I paint and like you are
not very good, but I find it a great artistic
therapy.
Thankyou for the read.
Jenny.
Silver Spun Sand | January 14, 2011 - 10:37
Happy painting, Jenny...and you are so very right about the therapeutic benefits. It is so relaxing and clears one's mind of all else.
As you say, memories are so evocative in this changing world of ours. Such is progress, I guess;-)
Many thanks for sharing your thoughts and I am pleased you enjoyed the poem;-)
Tina
seashore | January 14, 2011 - 10:55
Another good one, Tina
Silver Spun Sand | January 14, 2011 - 11:10
Pleased you think so, Coral. Many thanks;-)
Tina
MistakenMagic | January 14, 2011 - 13:14
I love the two-stanza split structure, Tina. A very poignant and beautiful piece - it is not too loud but it speaks volumes :)
Magic xxx
Silver Spun Sand | January 14, 2011 - 13:42
Thanks, Magic. I'm glad you noticed the structure because I literally 'tore my hair out' trying to getting it right;-)
Tina xxx
rjnewlyn | January 14, 2011 - 22:21
It's certainly up there with your best. Perfect structure, perfect imagery - especially the contrast between charcoal and watercolour which adds a bit of muddiness and makes sure it has some bite. And full of nostalgia (in the literal meaning of that word).
Rob
Silver Spun Sand | January 15, 2011 - 08:59
Thanks, Rob, for appreciating 'the finer points';-)
As far as the structure is concerned, it took quite a while to get it the way it is, and then it all just seemed to fall into place. Really pleased you noticed.
Tina
Deepanker Saxena | January 15, 2011 - 14:49
mst say beautiful use of words...really could picturize each and every line of ur poem...
truly awesome words and style...
Deepanker SAxena
Silver Spun Sand | January 15, 2011 - 15:18
Deepanker...my thanks to you for taking the time and trouble to read, and to comment, so kindly;-)
Tina
Beeme | January 15, 2011 - 21:55
I really enjoyed Tina, beautiful imagery :)
Beeme xx
Silver Spun Sand | January 15, 2011 - 22:06
Thanks so much, Beeme. Pleased you enjoyed;-)
Tina xx
Deepanker Saxena | January 16, 2011 - 14:27
its my pleasure tina..
n m new here,jst uploading poems of mine..
would be great if u read and comment.
Geertje Jong | January 17, 2011 - 19:43
What can I say that has not already been said, but for good measure I will add...........how memories are pictures which will never let us forget!
Super! I can smell the water from where I am sitting.
Geertje
Silver Spun Sand | January 17, 2011 - 22:03
Geertje - we meet again. Thanks for reading and for your more than colourful comments;-)
Tina;-)