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Seven for the Seven Stars in the Sky (IP)

Posted by Silver Spun Sand on February 6, 2011 - 13:29
from the ABC set Silver Spun Sand Poems

His final tour of duty, and this,
his very last night; thank Christ!
For once, the guns were quiet.

He lay on his back, counting
the planets and constellations.
Levelling, to think of earth
as a mere speck of sand
in the grand scheme of things.

No life on Mars, nor Saturn
or Jupiter, but, just somewhere
there had to be a world like ours.

And if there was, would there be
a thing called ‘love’ there? Only,
where was love right now...
in this fucking, futile war?

Took a drag on a half-finished
smoke; the stars putting on a show
in his honour, or so he kidded
himself. On the horizon, the flash
of mortar fire grew ever brighter.

His heart raced as he patted
his top left, breast-pocket –
took out his mobile phone;

a photo of him and his son, the night
before he’d left. The two of them
camping out in their back-yard.

“Take me with you,” he’d asked
and, in a way, he had. Seven,
was Jack, but a wise head on such
small shoulders, and his words
came flooding back.

“Look up there! The Plough,
Dad. I bet it’s even higher
than the moon. God made it,
and He’s everywhere, so,

in the desert you’ll see it too!”
And he was right; more right
than he could ever know.

Discuss this piece in the abctales forum


Comments

skinner_jennifer | February 6, 2011 - 14:27

Hi Tina,

this is incredibly moving, it made me think of all
those soldiers out there, who could be the man in
your poem. They could be looking up at those stars
right now, getting there mobile phone out, seeing a
picture of there loved ones and looking up at the
stars in a sky.

You have really thought about these words, it is
so clear. Thankyou for such a great read.

A good one for the IP.

Jenny.

Silver Spun Sand | February 6, 2011 - 14:30

Thanks so much, Jenny;-) As you say, this could be about one soldier, or many. Much appreciate your words.

Tina

ScoZen | February 6, 2011 - 16:04

ScoZen
Hello there, Sand Lady.
I liked this but also found it depressing re the war
image.

"...a photo of him and his son..."

Perhaps more people should consider family before they go off to battle.
Kind regards.

Silver Spun Sand | February 6, 2011 - 17:43

Hi there, ScoZen;-)

You bring up a good point, but as in the case of my own family, sometimes people 'sign up' for the army, navy or whatever, when they are very young. Subsequently they marry and have a family and then things get very complicated and difficult. As well as changing circumstances, I also guess that people have differing views as to where there ultimate responsibilities lie.

Thanks for reading.

Sand Lady;-)

rjnewlyn | February 6, 2011 - 18:22

You're right. I've a family member in that situation - signed up young and then it becomes your career, the thing you know how to do best, and the family arrive afterwards. He was in Afghanistan for a 6-month stint not that long ago. Luckily he got through OK. Maybe it was thinking about him and his two little ones which made this so moving, but I think I would have felt that way anyway.

Rob

Silver Spun Sand | February 6, 2011 - 18:35

Thanks Rob;-) The situation with my son-in-law was almost exactly as you describe, and the same thing happened to his brother, who subsequently served in the Gulf. Sadly, in his case, his story didn't have a happy ending.

Tina

Beeme | February 6, 2011 - 19:00

I agree with Jenny, incredibly moving and beautiful Tina.

Beeme xx

Silver Spun Sand | February 6, 2011 - 22:09

Thanks, so very much, Beeme;-)

Tina xx

fatboy74 | February 7, 2011 - 08:34

This is the one that appealed to me too Tina and I think I will have a go at, although I doubt I can do as good a job as this. Very moving and a beautiful ending. :-)

Silver Spun Sand | February 7, 2011 - 09:00

Thanks for that, fb, and I shall look forward to reading yours;-)

Tina

Highhat | February 7, 2011 - 19:53

I tend to agree with ScoZen why do they sign up to start with? I think it is such a futile battle against others- but we are in it for good I suppose. So young. You portraid it well Tina. Thank you for making me think twice.
;)Pia

Silver Spun Sand | February 7, 2011 - 21:58

Thanks, Pia for reading, and commenting so kindly.

Tina;-)

Kahdai | February 10, 2011 - 12:00

I always liked the idea you know that people could be far away looking at the same stars :) nice IP Tina xx K

Silver Spun Sand | February 10, 2011 - 12:16

Kahdai, many thanks. You got it...in one!!

Tina xx