I won’t come back
and haunt you
neither will you find me
in the next room,
contrary to popular belief.
In fact I’m long gone
right this second
through the open window
the one you were
intent on closing –
said I’d catch my death.
You always did
make me laugh, say
the most crazy things …
and I mean that
in a nice way.
No need to glance
over your shoulder
or look to the heavens,
name a star after me –
I never was keen on heights.
Nonetheless,
a romantic notion
so believe what you will.
The shell that encased me
has broken open
and now I’m free.
In the grand scheme of things
in the blink of an eyelid
we two will be together again.
The way I see it –
as long as the sun rises
and the moon sets,
wherever you are
so shall I be.
That, I promise you.
Comments
MistakenMagic | October 14, 2008 - 20:58
'No need to glance
over your shoulder
or look to the heavens,
name a star after me –
I never was keen on heights.'
- I loved this unique phrasing :) Your voice when writing is always full of emotion, sharp and witty. I always enjoy everything you write! And yes the essays have been drowning me - just finished one about an hour ago. I'm waiting for the cooling off period - may it come soon!
Nathan Bednarek | October 14, 2008 - 21:11
Now this is a true declaration of love dear Tina. The love for your daughter is so powerful in this poem Tina, the love of a wonderful mother... ;-)
It's moving, deep and it touches my heart deeply. The lines quoted by Magic above are in my opinion the most beautiful words in poetry that I ever had the chance to read. What a uniquely emotional piece!
I don't want to make any other comments Tina- this poem speaks for itself.
Love exists in every line, in every word of this poem.
I would say 'great work', but that would be an understatement. ;-)
Love, Nathan.
jennifer | October 15, 2008 - 08:29
These are the lines that did it for me:
'The shell that encased me
has broken open
and now I’m free.'
So visual and yet so sad and yet so uplifting.
Beauty in simplicity is what you have achieved here!
Silver Spun Sand | October 15, 2008 - 09:51
Magic - if I could hasten your 'cooling off period' I would, believe me. You sure do deserve it, so savour it when it arrives:-)
Thank you for your words. I do appreciate them. It's good to know that my words mean something to you as well.
Tina x
Silver Spun Sand | October 15, 2008 - 09:55
Nathan - you did it again. Read between the lines, I mean. Love is so difficult to put into words and so is loss and pain and that is why I appreciate your telling me that I managed to convey at least something of what I feel through the words of this poem.
Sincere thanks to you.
Love,
Tina
Silver Spun Sand | October 15, 2008 - 09:59
Jennifer, it was interesting that you picked out these lines. I started writing this poem a good few months ago now, and only yesterday, just before I posted it, did I manage to find the right words for what I was hoping to convey. It's good to know that for you at least, I achieved my aim.
Thank you for reading and for taking the trouble to comment so encouragingly.
Tina
Bradene | October 15, 2008 - 11:09
This is another one I never tire of reading Tina.A beautiful offering Val x
luigi_pagano | October 15, 2008 - 11:11
Ditto dear Tina.
Luigi x to the power of 5.
Silver Spun Sand | October 15, 2008 - 12:52
Good of you to drop by, dear Val and my thanks to you for reading. Oh and yes - I am feeling much better now thanks. Just a slight cough and a few sniffles:-)
Tina xx
Silver Spun Sand | October 15, 2008 - 12:56
Luigi - thank you for reading. Much appreciated.
I hope you are in fine fettle this not so fine Autumn day. It is tipping it down here and the leaves have decided to all fall at once for some strange reason so I shall have to get busy with my broom:-)
Tina xxxxxx
artisus | October 15, 2008 - 17:47
Tina, I like the layout, the flow, and the message.
x
Silver Spun Sand | October 15, 2008 - 20:43
Nic - my thanks to you for reading. I was a long while getting this one right but I think I may well have won the battle ... for now anyway.
Tina:-)x
pumadelta | November 18, 2008 - 14:16
truly magical thanks for the love.....with a cherry on top!!!