Nice Night For It

He never meant to hurt her. He wouldn’t have hurt anyone, not even the proverbial fly. You have to believe me. For instance, ever so good to his old mum he is. Takes her shopping every Friday, regular as clockwork.

They’re in the fishmongers, right and she says she’d like a nice piece of skate for her tea. He says, “Put your purse away, Mum. My treat.”

Do you know what I mean? Heart of gold he’s got. Just an ordinary bloke who lives down my street. Known him all my life, well practically anyway.

One thing he does like is his pint with his mates down the local of a Saturday. She’d been in a couple of weeks running and they’d only sort of eyed each other up before, if you know what I mean.

Anyhow, this particular Saturday, me and him were having a few jars as normal, when she walks in – dolled up to the nines as it happens. This night they sort of ‘click’, if you get my drift and he takes her home. It’s true, they’d both had a bit to drink. Not what you’d call drunk mind, just a bit tipsy you might say.

She says to him, “Do you want to stay the night?”

He says, “OK then. You sure love?” Or so he tells me.

So he did – stay the night I mean and then one thing lead to another, if you get my drift … It just seemed to happen natural-like, or so he said to me.

Next day though, when he gets back home, two coppers come to his flat and arrest him. Frog-march him down the nick. That’s when he rings me.

At the end of the day, he’s just a regular bloke. Like I told you he told me, he never meant her no harm.

She just never says, “No" ... or "Yes", come to that. That’s the way he remembers it, any road.

Didn’t know a thing like that could come to a thing like this though. Just goes to show. It makes you think. Don’t it your Honour?