Saturday 15th March 2008.
Firstly, I think this might be the hangover that kills me. My head is loose I have to keep it very still otherwise it might sever and roll across the shop floor trailing brain entrails and spinal chord, it's a rare and little know phenomenon called Spontaneous human severance. Initially I blamed God, he could have sent lightening, he could quite easily have turned the vodka into water, how difficult would that have been for him? Then I blamed Russ, how many times did he remind me that trying to work with a severed head wouldn't be god for business? Not one. But finally I decided that this was unfair and that I only had one person to blame ... Rick. Rick is my scapegoat and I intend to blame him for everything from being a bad boyfriend to global warming.
I have got one hell of a boyfriend.
Deep down I knew that I had nothing to worry about and if things hadn't been so bad between us recently I wouldn't have given it a second though, “Oh by the way we're going out with my ex tonight, love, but he's a dick and you're not.”
As it was they all got on brilliantly and we had a great night. Rick kept telling me what a cracking bloke Russ is... so did Lesley.
Apparently Rick hasn't changed one little bit. He's been seeing a woman called Amanda, while knocking off the landlady of his local pub .. and then this afternoon he has a date, he's meeting a woman that he's been talking to on the internet ... hmmm, sounds familiar. Once a tart always a tart. Lesley was telling me that she hates going out in a foursome with him and Amanda because the girl's besotted with him and Les and Bob are both fully aware that he's seeing other women. It puts them in an awkward position. I certinaly wish they'd given me that heads up as to what he was like when we were all knocking about together. It might have saved me a lot of heartache later on.
Even now, I am still a little bit bitter about the way he treated me. I don't think I realised until last night just how bad he is. I know there were at least three other women while we were together, but it was only last night talking to him and then to Lesley that I realised that he actually enjoys being a player. While I was in love and thinking that I'd met a life partner, he was saying all the right words. I got the 'I love you's' and the asking me to move in with him knowing damned well that I'd say no. I knew before last night that he's naughty, what I didn't realise was that he actually gets off on causing women pain and seeing just what he can get away with right under their noses. All the time I was going through hell with him I thought that he was suffering too when in fact it was all just playing a part to him.
He's really not a good person.
But we did have fun last night. He's done me a huge favour. I think I needed last night to show me just how lucky I am to have a man like Russ who thinks the world of me. I'm really glad they came. Rick as usual took some abuse. I told him that I couldn't spell 'bastard' or 'wanker' before he took a starring role in Jane Doe three, but was completely obscenity conversant by the time I'd done. As a friend, he's brilliant, we have a good laugh and I enjoy his company.
I was so proud of Russ last night... he lost his virginity.
I've been trying to get him to sing on Karaoke since I met him. Last night he did...several times. Rick and Bob have both got terrible voices but have a real good laugh with it and enjoy getting up and having a do. Russ sang with them and did Sweet Caroline, Don't let the Sun go down on me, and Tainted love. He was definitely the best of the three of them. And I got him to admit this morning that he'd enjoyed it.
And I get to do it all again tonight. Mandy's got a gig in Dtown so I'm going along there with them, as long as the exhaustion doesn't hit mid afternoon and I end up cancelling.
I think all I'm fit for is a hot bath and bed.
