King Henry the eighth
As a husband or mate
Was hardly the best that you’ve seen
If you think this is trite
Or I speak out of spite
Have a quick word with poor Anne Boleyn
His greatest desire
Was to become sire
No! Not in that context you fool.
I know he was king
But that was all bling
He wanted a child that could rule
That he failed to create
Got him in a right state
Num’rous wives he brought to dizzy heights
He broke all the rules
But still his poor tool
Seemed to lie fruitlessly in his tights
Now the poor man had gout
And I have no doubt
That this couldn’t have helped in his quest
But worse sure than this
Was the old syphilis
Which proved, a more virulent test
Frustration, disease
And two dodgy knees
Left him quite buggered in bed
But when his ladies
Just couldn’t conceive
Well, more than the king lost his head
So modern wives list…
And don’t get so pissed
When sex takes the form of a tax
Just think of poor Anne
And the rest of the clan
Cold shouldered is better than axed
Comments
Miss_D_Meaner | September 21, 2009 - 08:37
Love it!!!!! Funny and clever. xx
threeleafshamrock | September 21, 2009 - 09:53
Thanks Kinky Nutter ;)
MistakenMagic | September 21, 2009 - 16:33
You know what I think of these funny poems of yours Chris so I'm just going to stick with ':p' and ';D'
Magic xxx
SundaysChild | September 21, 2009 - 19:30
Hey great poem!
Have just been reading 'The Other Boleyn Girl' by Philippa Gregory (fab read by the way).
Anne Boleyn is made out to be really wicked and unpleasant!
I know she was ambitious but she deserves some sympathy as she was a product of the times!
Well done, neat piece
Sunday x
threeleafshamrock | September 21, 2009 - 19:34
She was going well till she lost the head...
Thanks SC ;) xxx
Miss_D_Meaner | September 21, 2009 - 19:40
She should have used Head and Shoulders shampoo! :)
threeleafshamrock | September 21, 2009 - 21:56
She should have used a metal neck brace...;)
threeleafshamrock | September 21, 2009 - 21:58
Thanks Magic, I noticed that my comment to you did not come up. This bloody broadband is driving me nuts. Sorry about the shortage of comments on everyone's work; could be a week before storm damage repaired :(
Glad you liked XXXX
littlebit59 | September 21, 2009 - 22:25
Couldn't get enough of the Showtime series (here in the states) "The Tudors". Of course, they took a lot of poetic license but it was sexy as hell and you know that fat old fuck was way far from anything aphrodisiac.
Funny and well done.
Beeme | September 22, 2009 - 06:48
I really enjoyed this Chris, made me laugh out loud. Very funny, well done. :)
Beeme xx
threeleafshamrock | September 22, 2009 - 07:47
Thanks Jeanne and Beeme, glad you both got a laugh out of it.
Please excuse the delay in answering or reading work but having some serious trouble with broadband, due to storm damage on the system (satalite). Hope to be back to normal soon. XXX