Photographs and Memories

This is so beautiful, Chris. It was as if I too, was looking at that snapshot.

My favourite stanza:-

"Hands entwined, resting on the handle
of the turf spade; peaceful, beautiful!
His sweat sheeny brow, haloed,
eclipsing the sun from my viewpoint
in his shadow."

Much enjoyed;-)

Tina xx

Thanks so much Tina; sometimes seems like I'm always trying to write something to do him justice. Thanks for the kind words. XX

I like this: it contains a lovely sentiment. Tina's favourite stanza is nice, my favourite is the second.

In my humble opinion, which, naturally, you are free to disagree with, the content of the last line is superfluous. It is quite clear from the rest of the poem how you felt/feel.

To put it in terms of prose-based creative writing dogma, it's as though after a wonderful bit of sustained 'showing' you felt the need to 'tell' to hammer the point home.

Very nice, all the same
Ewan

Thanks Ewan, I take your point. I always seem to feel the need to 'tell all' in one last line, I don't know why. I think it may be the fear that the message is not adequately sent and that there may be some ambiguity, which leaves it somehow incomplete. It's not the first time that I have done this. I will take the line out and trust the rest of the piece to say it. Thanks for the observation and advice, much appreciated.

Chris ;)

Wow thanks for the cherry folks ;)

I so agreed with Ewan and it works splendidly now, Chris. Well done on the much-deserved cherry;-)

Tina xx

Thanks again Tina ;) XX

I didn't read it before the change - but it is a superb poem and a well deserved cherry:) x

I too just adore the stanza Tina quoted! Well done on the cherry Chris, much deserved ;)

Magic xxx

Ditto all the above - lovely. Margot

Thank you sarah ;)

Thanks Magic, it would have been his birthday on Monday 15th June so...Happy Birthday dad, where ever you are... XX

Thanks for reading Margot XX

Hi Chris.
I love this description

"He was huge in that moment; God like!
No matter the threadbare and
oft mended shirt, the scuffed boots
or unruly hair ..."

and the way you led me to his God like stature then revealed the true nature of his attire and so much more with it.

Very good stuff. ;-) And a well deserved cherry mate.

Thanks J. ;)

Superb poem, Chris, really evocative and personal, enjoyed it very much,

J x

Thanks Jen, much appreciated. ;) XX

'I longed to hear his thoughts;
to share, to know, to be a part of.
I had not the words then, nor the vocabulary
I had not the courage required to intrude
and so, stood awed.'

I can really feel this poem, Chris. I've had this moment with both my parents- observing them and seeing something more... something that makes them as individuals, human. However, such moments mainly remind me why they are my role models. Thank you for posting this poem. It really deserves its cherry. Well done!

Nathan.

Thanks again Nathan glad you enjoyed - this is one of my favourites from my own work ;)