All Agreed?


from the ABC set Poetry

Once upon a time, we all lived happily ever after.

But what if
the cooperation we willingly give
in order to further the goal
of a whole
in agreement,
then morphs 'we'
into a mass of equilibrium
that murmurs not,
of disharmony,
unfair dis-advantage
or dichotomy
but instead is completely
at easy
with itself?
A pulsing in unison
union of all that is
and was,
to never be singularly again?
Shared desire,
worshipping together
at the flaming pyre of
our selves,
our traits,
our reals,
our fakes,
our rises,
our falls
and all
the mistakes
that led us there
to that
point in time
cooperating like rhyme
with all the rest
into at last
the last
a single breath
drawn into each
one
weaving and spun
vibrating one note
till all that is spoke
is
same same
again
and again
and there would be nothing more to say.
in
...the end.

.....x.....

Left right
day night
black white
dark light
in cooperation
...out of sight.

.....x.....

It is in the disagree
that we
find our source
of reasoning

It is in the disarray
that we
find our need
for harmony

Discuss this piece in the abctales forum


Comments

The Chosen One | December 11, 2008 - 17:55

Enjoyed reading this.. :-)

tcook | December 12, 2008 - 15:17

I enjoyed it too - but I'm not sure that the final verses add much. Maybe it should finish at 'the end'?

tinalouise | December 12, 2008 - 16:37

Thanks so much for taking the time to read this and comment - very much appreciated. I too wasn't sure about the final bits; they were after-thoughts that occured once I had finished the main poem... but I think I may agree that they don't really serve a purpose. Thanks again and I love cherries!!

Namaste,
Tina Louise

“The world is a dangerous place. Not because of the people who are evil; but because of the people who don't do anything about it.”
Albert Einstein

jennifer | December 13, 2008 - 19:19

The 'afterthoughts' are unnecessary - it is complete without them.

Interesting, well-structured, and snappy rhythm!

However, one small gripe - 'at ease', not 'at easy'

J x