a redhead

I was purchasing vegetarian sandwiches in Boots the other day with a male friend when I saw her. The plan was that we would split the sandwiches, so that we could mutually share the experience of both the hummus and red cabbage combination, and the butternut squash and rocket partnership.

It was a fairly long queue, a stretch of six or seven people in front of us, and only one clerk on the tills. An Asian lady. We were both hungry for the sandwiches. The smell of my friend always makes me want to fuck him, and we were standing very close so that our pheromones were colliding dangerously.

The result of the tedium, the sandwiches and the pheromones would not have been remarkable if a stunning, impish girl had not joined the growing queue, about two sets of people behind us. She was about my height and build, five six, size ten, 32 C. Hair the colour of sunsets framed her elfin face. Perfect porcelain skin glowed around her features, which were like rose buds in spring. She wore a long, fuzzy cardigan that I wanted to wrap myself up in.

'She’s fucking beautiful. Wow' murmured my friend in my ear, but all the time she was looking at me. Her soft petal lips longed to be kissed, just like mine.

'I think she’s checking you out' was the next curious observation by my intrigued companion. The thought of it excited me. A girl? I regarded her in a different light to the way I usually view girls; usually, if I’m staring at a girl it’s because I’m admiring their shoes or hairstyle, or another cosmetic successes that I can plagiarise.

Here I was admiring this beautiful eighteen year old for her glittering olive eyes and pure milky skin for all their feminine beauty. Picturing what those slender fingers and peach lips could do, imagining painting her in oils while she sat naked on my bed, in post orgasm bliss.

I shuddered slightly and rushed to pay for my sandwich, handed over the cash and my Advantage card.
The harsh cold of the high street hit me as I left the chemist. We sat and ate our sandwiches in front of the NatWest bank. All I could taste was desire.

Discuss this piece in the abctales forum


Comments

individuality_a... | November 3, 2009 - 21:27

good write, nice read. I too have a weakness for the red haired goddesses that grace our planet. thanks for sharing. Peace n love

Curse of 222 | November 3, 2009 - 21:35

interesting concept with plenty of room to flesh out into a longer piece if so desired. i like the somewhat stylized syntax, but would encourage you to proof read. typos and iffy grammar can turn off new readers.
all in all, a good piece with lots of potential.

jason

venus in furs | November 3, 2009 - 22:40

Thankyou for the comments and advice. Jason, you are entirely correct about the typos, i cant believe i allowed such obvious errors to slide past me, it irritates the hell out of me if im reading somthing and its peppered with mistakes. its the reason i deleted my facebook! i shall now work out how to alter it.
merci

tcook | November 4, 2009 - 11:45

Just hit the 'edit' button and correct it. There are indeed many mistakes in it but it is a perfectly good piece of writing underneath it all! It needs to be an '18' though. I have corrected that.

tcook | November 4, 2009 - 18:31

And now it gets a cherry!

venus in furs | November 4, 2009 - 18:32

Thanks, i have ammended the errors. I shall also consider my age censoring with more care in future. x

venus in furs | November 4, 2009 - 18:33

wow! im thoroughly chuffed!

Cavalcaderl | November 4, 2009 - 19:36

new venus in furs
this is great congratulations
on the cherry! welcome Abctales.
Times my fingers slip on keys
whoosh press button gone.I used
love being redhead till allergy
hence grey now,but still same inside.
I was mousey colour years had it reddish
when young cheered me up..
julie x cavalcader (;-

Curse of 222 | November 4, 2009 - 20:48

congrats on the cherry! keep up the good work!

jason

eilidh.101@hotm... | November 8, 2009 - 14:18

I really enjoyed this. The redhead part got my, being a redhead myself. Nice read, I was there.

venus in furs | November 9, 2009 - 19:23

im glad so manye people seem to be able to relate to this, what with red hair being such a glorious rarity

maggyvaneijk | April 10, 2010 - 19:48

great piece. The girl you're describing reminds me of the new Dr Who companion :)