The world is sudden bright with beauty,
as women bloom beneath the sun
and I cannot help but wonder
where they were all winter long.
My heart has been in hibernation
and eyes begrimed by dreamless sleep,
while cocooned maidens metamorphed
to damsels dancing down the street.
In gossamer garb, pale skin aglow,
they bounce with bountiful delight
that sparks endorphins, fires desire,
like music written for my eyes.
Yet summer is a fleeting glory,
which comes too soon and swiftly fades
back to drab and ordinary
dullness of another day.
Comments
sunshine | May 8, 2008 - 22:12
lovely celebration of the sudden change of season we're currently enjoying - I struggle a little with the juxtaposition of 'bounce' and 'bountiful'.
WilkyBarKid | May 9, 2008 - 09:08
You're too generous. This is pretty poor really. It has no depth and is a bit sexist. The alliteration is overdone, as you say. The repetition of 'eyes' is particularly weak. And the sun has stopped shining in London already!
sunshine | May 9, 2008 - 16:20
But maybe you are too harsh on yourself - if it should have had depth then yes, you have failed. But as a light hearted celebration of the moment it worked well in my view and I imagined it as a song. At first I thought the ending too sudden, abrupt. But then as you've just reminded us, this is the way with weather. As to the sexism it doesn't come across to me as derogatory or in any way as denegrating women but rather an awakening of the man. Perhaps in that I am too generous? Only you will know the answer to this one. Margot
DavidK | May 10, 2008 - 09:12
Is appreciating women - and explaining why - sexist these days? I hope not!