My physics teacher, Mr. Pendle
Was driving me nuts
I was going mental
I just don't care about types of rocks.
Or biodegradable bleedin' socks.
Me and my mates, had had enough
So we made a plan
That was gunna be tough.
A silent protest sounds easy to you
But boy was it hard
The WHOLE CLASS did it too.
The classroom was silent
But the atmosphere buzzed
Sir stood there talking
His confidence fuzzed.
He began to get shifty
He started to squirm
The boring
Pathetic
Evil
Worm.
The tension built higher
As he asked us his questions
The nerds?
They were worried,
But the silence din't lessen.
Looking back now
It was childish to have done.
But that physics lesson?
The best seen under the sun.
Comments
Nathan Bednarek | January 20, 2010 - 01:00
Brilliant! A very funny poem. I think every one of us remembers one particular lesson that was special in one way or another ;-)
I just have one small reservation though, but I might be wrong as it may be that you're doing this on purpose, so tell me if I'm wrong.
It's the mistakes you make in spelling, grammar and punctuation. I realise that it was deliberate in your last poem about dyslexia, but is this the same case here? I understand that you sometimes want to use words like 'gunna' to describe the usual way people speak, but I don't think that not putting an apostrophe in DON'T was on purpose. I know this sounds boring and pedantic, but I really think it's worth the effort to look through your poem and eliminate any mistakes and add anything that needs to be added. It's just that such mistakes are very distracting for the reader and may cause the poem to be less enjoyable.
I hope my comment isn't too harsh. Overall (and I always said this), your work is very good and I always look forward to reading it, so keep it up ;-)
Nathan.
Yazmin | January 20, 2010 - 07:43
It's not at all harsh, thanks for helping me :), is this better?
Yaz.
Nathan Bednarek | January 20, 2010 - 12:11
Yes, the poem flows smoothly now. Again, well done on this one.
Nathan.
Yazmin | January 20, 2010 - 12:28
Cool
Thank you
Yaz
Lit | January 20, 2010 - 23:59
This is awesome :) I really like the structure, it reflects the breaking the rules theme.
Yazmin | January 21, 2010 - 15:30
Aw thanks for the nice comment, I really appreciate it :)
Yaz
EpheLuwe | January 21, 2010 - 18:08
Mr Pendle. haha.
Oh, he is such an interesting physics teacher... Thanks for the laugh :P :)
Yazmin | January 22, 2010 - 15:37
You get who I'm on about then?! Interesting isn't the first word that comes to mind when I think of him!
Thanks
Yaz x