CRIME AND PUNISHMENT
Poems and Tales about crime and its consequences.
ACCESSORY TO BUGLARY What looks good on a burglar? And is colored black and tan? Not a swag bag or a Balaclava No ski mask but a Doberman A POUND OFF IF WERE LATE
What looks good on a burglar? And is colored black and tan? Not a swag bag or a Balaclava No ski mask but a Doberman
If you should ever want to shoot someone I have an idea on how best it may be done For it to be unnoticed you must do it right Wait until the fun begins on bonfire night
On public transport You are reminded constantly To be alert and vigilant And report suspicious things you see But if I saw something That might be construed suspicious
Three men stand before the court On drugs charges that are brought After due process the verdict of all "Guilty followed by the gavels fall
The metropolitan police arrested a man He wasn’t a Londoner he was from Iran What’s his form they would like to know There’s nothing about him at the C.R.O.
The police have found a dead body Well half of it as it was decapitated They could only guess at marital status If not divorced then certainly separated
If the police have you cornered There's no way out, you're in a fix Then sit tight, await instructions "Give up and come out” no tricks Don't try to shoot your way out
You were stopped late one Saturday night Because of a defective breaking light Through the window "good morning ocifer” To the constable you just manage to slur
A portly man stands in the dock Head bowed down and white with shock Its been decided you did the crime You’ll really pay the price this time The gavel falls down with a bang
When you’re behind bars in prison much of your time is spent Looking through the bars dreaming of your release day event But if you’re at work you spend much of your time looking afar
When you’re in prison you may have plenty of time to kill But you don’t have to work and the taxpayer foots the bill But when you’re at work it costs you to get there every day
There are no flies on me Of which to speak As a result my case Now comes up next week
They were stood in the old wooden bus shelter by the village green just after midnight in the depths of a passionate kiss. Lynda Godfrey and Steve Smith had only met that evening at Cassie’s 18th birthday party.
The police, investigating a series of horrific murders Appear to be out manoeuvred at every turn
When you're in prison You're in a cell twenty three hours a day But if you're at work You're trapped in a cubicle to earn your pay When you're in prison For being good you get time off I'm assured
I was employed as a custody assistant by a security company called Really Secure Ltd in their custodial services division with the sole purpose of manning the "Custody Bus on behalf of Frumpshire County Constabulary.
PICK A POCKET ANY POCKET Last winter it was just about as cold as it can get It was so cold you wouldn’t even go out for cigarettes
There was once this terrorist group Some obscure fundamentalist troup Who hijacked one of the Jumbo fleet With a Journalist in every single seat
A man was walking one night Down a lane without a light Thinking that he heard a sound The man then turned around Someone jumped him suddenly And assaulted him violently
There was a murder in a Norfolk village But the police are struggling to solve it
When the police pulled me over The reason wasn’t exactly clear It could have been the speeding
When the police caught me speeding My eyes were strained and blinking I was pulled over by a putz
When a cop stopped me for speeding They fined me one hundred pounds
When you appear in the crown court You put your faith in, without a thought Twelve people who weren't, frankly Smart enough to get out of jury duty