Entrance Exam
By ice rivers
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Let's go back to that famous drawing of either the old hag or the beautiful woman where the shoulder of the beautiful woman is also the nose of the old hag, depending upon how you look at it.
Now.....take a look at this word
ENTRANCE
If you look at it as a noun you see one thing probably a sign.
If you look at it as a verb, it's a whole different drawing.
To entrance is an active verb meaning to fill with delight, joy or charm.
When I enter the entrance of Yankee Stadium, I am filled with delight in the present, joy in the memories and charm in the traditions.
The Stadium itself is actively influencing me and changing my perception joyfully.
This is an entrance.
As a direct result, I am entranced and will remain that way until I exit which I suppose literally means to put an X through that previous entrancement and get on with whom I was before I was entranced.
On the flip side, a local high school made a big deal out of the bulletin board in front of the school. The board read "enterance" instead of "entrance". The "misspelling" was left on display for seven months until a passerby finally noticed it and brought it up to the principal who immediately deferred responsibility, claiming that the misspelling was intentional and the school was waiting to see how long it would take for someone to notice it. In other words, 'don't think I'm a fool for putting it up there when it took you fools seven months to notice it etc'.
Kinda Trumpian when you think about it.
Anyways, I thought about it and this essay is the recording of my thoughts about it as I actually think about them which is what an essay is all about.
I'm gonna take the position that for a great majority of "students" entering that particular "school", ENTERANCE is a far more accurate choice of words than ENTRANCE. Most of them are going through those doors in fulfillment of education's great responsibility which is custodial. These kids have got to go SOMEWHERE when the parents have to work and at least at these places we know where they are.
While they're here we might as well give them something to do. That somethig is, of course, "education".
"Education" is rarely asociated with joy, delight, or charm unless there is joy in fear, delight in boredom,
and charm in conformity.
The only trance that is induced is the trance called prretending to be interested while wishing you were any place other that where you are.
And from which you wish to x it.
Get up out of that seat and into the street.
So thank you high school bulletin board for being so accurate in your enterance...a place to enter.
Thank you Yankee Stadium for your entrance..a place of joy, delight and charm.
Thank you Old Hag for that bulbous nose.
And thank you Beautiful Woman for those elegant shoulders.
One in the same but totally different.
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