Thu, 14 May 2020
Kids! Do not try this at home!
Jacob Rees-Mogg used to look like
Connecting his brain
to his gaming computer
using a beanie electrode skull cap
with an oozbee t'other end,
to his astonishment,
four new HDDs appeared in Disk Management:
Stem, Cerebellum, Limbic, Cortex,
and a FDD labelled: motivation?
Ignoring Total Loss warnings,
he formatted Cortex,
marking all sneaked-in garbage
from parents, teachers, church, CIA, et al.
changing FAT 32 to THIN 64,
as an extra, see-what-happens bonus!
Confirming Enter twice,
an enormous load left his mind;
clicking Defrag, and Trim,
cleansed off eighteen stones more,
his underpants and cap dropping loose
as his bum and head became
In this state of panic,
he carelessly snatched out the oozbee
before safe pausing 5v power,
the floppy disk icon flashed red,
and his dick went limp!
With cyber-porn no longer
an edifying pastime,
and intelligence deleted,
his only option was to find a job
Oozbee is nerd for USB connector
Warning: Use exFAT, not THIN 64!