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This probably sounds horribly egotistical, so sorry for doing this so blatantly, but I'd be very grateful for some feedback on a short story I've just put up on here - I've very been very impressed with a lot of what I've read on ABC, so I'd quite like to see what people think of what I've come up with...

Any comment, good, bad or just plain insulting much appreciated... ;)

Illuminations

http://www.abctales.com/abcplex/viewstory.cgi?s=4001

Thanks,

Alex....

Carly Svamvour
Anonymous's picture
I thought it was quite clever. I liked the way you used the word .... was it 'juttered' 'juddered' ... for the streetcar Were you inspired by one of those big pictures with the lights - Boulevard of Dreams. You did Jack Nicholson really well - I could almost see him. He stole the show from Brando there.
Microchrist
Anonymous's picture
Ahhh,yes! I did enjoy that. Thanks for tipping me off in your direction! I haven't got time for a detailed critique but dammit all,I was entertained!!!!
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