General 'chew the fat' topic. 'What have I learned through Age?'

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General 'chew the fat' topic. 'What have I learned through Age?'

This is simply general chat and is open to Abc folks of any age. 'What have I learned through age?' The thing I have learned as the years go by is that, for me, often a person's views and opinions are the least part of them. My everyday friends have a broad sweep of views and often we say what we think and agree to differ. I feel I truly know people not by their views but by their deeds. What do you guys think? What do you feel you 'know now' that has changed from in the past?

perhaps is takes a lifetime to know yourself. I was thinking about this after (review to follow) of one of the books I was reading. I'm always meeting my better self going back the way I've come and smoothing things out. I don't know anything much. And I don't know much well. 


Hi Elsi,

the one thing I've learnt growing up, is that there's been a pattern to my life, like a patchwork quilt, a collection of events that lead up to now. I understand why they happened and the meanings behind them.

I'm contented now, because I lived such a full life while I was young and growing up, so I don't crave the high life anymore, not even travelling too far from home.

I don't know if I understand myself better now, but to be contented is by far the most important thing.



Yes, contentment can be good. I was thankful that my hot bus made it to Sidmouth yesterday after a traffic delay and that I had my sunhat, water and factor 30. The sea was warm enough for a good paddle. The heatwave may mean that the sea remains warm for a long time. And I  saw  Nessie! She has reincarnated herself in a park near the churchyard by Sidmouth bus terminus and become a garden sculpture.

can i join in?


a couple of things  - 

I spent too long believing 'you can't judge a book by it's cover'. I believe this is true of books. the saying should be 'you can't ALWAYS judge a book by it's cover'. 

and - fashion is for sheep. and teenagers.


Books and covers, I have pondered this myself. Smiths and Waterstones both market books by their covers so us the punters can tell 'sex and shopping' from 'whodunnit' from 'misery memoir' from 'arty literary' at a second's glance. However the quality of writing varies and can surprise in a good way. As for fashion, I do my own thing in a standard way with charity shops. I have two friends who run indie charity shops close to where I live, usually tops are £1 and summer dresses and jeans £1 or £2. I have to admit I colour my hair so I am a 'dark champagne blonde' sheep!


Hi. What I am learning as I mature is that peoples feelings emotions and well being is the most important part that I myself should be aware of. The words I say I should try too be positive and helpful a bit of a difference from the younger stephen who was adverse to drunken who gives a damn behaviour.

Stephen d

From my experience you never really know anyone. We are the person we are, the person we want to be seen as, and the person that others perceive. And not only are all these personalities different, they're fluid as well. They change with the environment: the person we are at work is not necessarily the person we are at home, or the person we are on the tube or in a car. We are chameleons. 

And we are rivers, changing our nature bit by bit as we journey relentlessly from watershed to the sea.

We are not what we seem and we are never quite the same from one day to the next.

The more we know, the more we don’t know.

We spend far too much time in the past or the future. The present moment is the only place we truly live.

And I will never like parsnips! (Probably)

I like parsnips. Agree with you about the moment.

I have recently discovered mindfulness - hence the new blog! It’s not a cure-all, but puts everything in a more expansive perspective... smiley

I have learned that you will never fully learn. The more you understand the more there is to understand and a greater openness will be required to prevent stagnation. 


My mother used to say to me "don't get old Stephen, it's no fun." Ain't that the truth. 


The feeling of "need" repels things from you. The more you "need" something, the less likely it may be that you will receive it. Ask for what you want, believe you will get it eventually, and get it off your mind. Don't "need" it.