Ask
By Simon Barget
- 405 reads
Ask, should I sit here alone?, and the world will scream, no, because it doesn’t want to be bothered by its own difficult thoughts. Our thoughts must be harmful. I don’t want to be with my thoughts, so you shouldn’t either. How could you handle them? Let’s ensure we’re not left with our thoughts. We’ll inflict all other harm before contending with thoughts, before wishing them upon others. Wanting to be alone is an act of violence suggesting wilful self-harm. Alone is shame and the anticipation of pain. Alone is silence, alone is wrong. Most people don’t consider being alone, will do everything to avoid it. Not a suspended or fake alone, where you’ll be saved shortly after. I mean one where you really don’t know anything apart from the moment, where the future is open, with no ties and no duties. No structure, no working, no rules and no Mondays. No accumulation of money or keeping wolf from the door. No friends and no family. Being alone with your thoughts is death. The death of wants. If your wants disappear, there’s nothing pulling you forward. Forward moves away from the thoughts, such is our hope, such our delusion. If nothing pulls you forward you’re stuck with the thoughts. The hell of them. Wants and being with others go hand in hand. Cementing wants, discussing and planning them. Being alone is feeling things as they are, without decoration; feeling things in their plainness, their dullness, their enormity, their incompletion. It is feeling what you are in totality. What we are could overwhelm us. Being alone shows the monster before the treasure. The monster is always here.
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Comments
Or alone with feelings.
Or alone with feelings. Having recently learnt to do this I have some respect for it. And I guess there is the other extreme to be wary of; we do need human connection as well as being able to embrace being alone with our thoughts or feelings, I think, anyway. I enjoyed reading your thoughts. Looked back and read some of your other posts, interesting stuff, particularly liked the ‘I am not ok’ piece (apologies if I have got the title wrong, but I can’t go back without losing my comment!).
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Yes, I see that. And I think
Yes, I see that. And I think you’re right that we all do.
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