A Devil's Advocate Explains Education

According to a report by Masters and Seton called Systematic Ambivalence, the most common reason for failure in Americasn schools is lack of interest. Of course, that lack of interest can be blamed on many factors but acccording to Masters and Seton, the primary reason for the fatal ambivalence is a lack of understanding about the purpose of schooling in the first place. 

Most failures don't grasp the fact that from beginning to ending, education is straight up competition melded with custodianship. The kids have to go somewhere so we decided to model the world of fish who first came up with the idea of schools as a way to protect the most vulnerable from predators.

Up until Covid struck, a person from outer space would notice that everyday, yellow vehicles picked up all of the children on this beautiful blue planet except for those within walking distance, and dropped them off in huge buildings where they disappeared for eight hours until suddenly, the yellow vehicles appeared once again.....the children boarded them and disppeared when they embarked in the viciity of their "homes".

God knows we couldn't let these vulnerable commodities onto the public streets where they were not only in danger but also presented a danger not just to themselves themselves but provided an incovenience to the general population.

At the same time, another group of children were chauffered to alluring hospices with the best facilities in order to get an even bigger headstart in their competion against their peers. The parents of these kids still had to battle against the angst and ambivalence of their offspring whose overwheming sense of entitlement blinded them to the fact that they were going to have to "work" to achieve.

Meanwhile, those at the bottom, gave up and used school as a place to come in out of the cold during the winter, to escape from the abuse of their homes at the hands of parents who also didn't give a shit /understand the "system", to find a girlfriend to beat up, join a gang, get pregnant or just hang around trying to earn street cred through failure under the lens of disillusioned, underpaid overwhelmed teachers looking to bury the losers on their way to dependence upon the government or crime or both to see them through their sad, disinterested lives to make room for the few who care about instruction enough to perservere and get that shitty, low paying job that nobody who connected with any teacher or administrator would ever do which they have been trying to avoid throughout their lives which provided enough fear to fuel the foolishness of twelve years of unanchored attendance 

Or maybe become boxers or musicians or whatever else they imagine will be their path the hell outta here when they finally get the fook outta school so they can begin a life that has already begun to ignore them at the first but probably not the last of institutions that they will encounter as they attempt to climb the ladder of success by muscling, fronting, sweating and bluffing their way through the gigantic half assed crowd crowd trying to get to the bottom rung.

They didn't care about school and now we don't care about them other than to get THEM the hell outta here.

We've got a place for them, a place where they truly begin to learn; a reserved pen in our overcrowded prisons.