The First Written Words
By ice rivers
- 299 reads
Snobbs increased the awareness of Clabb which fostered increased competition, jealousy, contempt, envy as the Wobbs tried to emulate the Sobbs, the Bobbs compared Jobbs to earn a higher spot in the Mobb. Everbody got jealous. Except for the Slobbs who continued clobberin' and humorlessly farbing.
All of this concern over Clabb was leading to Clabb warfare which thanks to the five million years of piloerections tended to favor the more aggressive and physically stronger Hobbs and Dobbs as they fought the never ending battle against the Cobbs.
Meanwhile a Nobb started to get the feeling that something up in the sky must be resposible for all this laffin', clobberin, and slobberin. The Nobb got together with a Tobb and invented Globb, a supreme being who was all powerful and could be blamed for all the shenanigans of Prog. The Nobbs who followed Globb were called Probbs. Some Nobbs opposed the Probs and claimed there was no Glob those Nobbs were called Proffs. Probbs and Proffs gathered along with Cobbs and bellowed arguments in secluded locations known as Scoobs.
The Hobbs and the Dobbs became resentful as the Probbs became popular with the Mobb who resented their place in the Clabb and yearned to be saved by the Globb and earn a place in his protection called the Clubb. With their usual aggression, The Hobbs and Dobbs used the Hubbs and the Gubbs to "discourage" the Probs who believed that Globb would save them from Clabb.
Eventually a Probb figured out a way to placate the fearsome and powerful Hobbs and Dobbs. The Probb declared that Hobbs and Dobbs were the personification of Globb and had all of Globb's power including inclusion to and exclusion from the Clubb and the Clabb.
Then one day a Cobb figured out a way to differentiate the sounds and gestures that everybody was making in the midst of the Prog and turn them into symbols that could express the thoughts and adventures of Hobbs all the way down to Slobbs. That Cobb known as Worbb began to tell all the stories in symbols that became known as words and thousanda of years later would be used by a philosopher named Hobbes to describe the history of Prog as determined mostly by the Hobbs, the Dobbs, The Cobbs, the Nobbs, the Probs, the Profs, the Snobs and the Tobbs. The overall lesson being that prestige comes from power and power comes from prestige. The tension between power and prestige...between Hobbs and Cobbs is perpetual and in times of panic and plague the Mobb will usually pray to Globb then fall in line under the Hobb who some mistake fror Globb.
Before this history could be recoreded, the first Worb had to come up with the first words and these are they.
"Let's go back a few million years."
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