Gambar 2
By ice rivers
- 493 reads
Back in Gambar's day, there wasn't a lot to do besides standing around and staying alive. Staying alive depended on hunting and gathering. Since Gambar was a tribal liability to both of those life sustaining and time consuming activities, he spent most of his hours standing around. When even that minimum exertion proved too strenuous,he devolved to sitting around and then lying around.
While sitting around one day Gambar and his companion, another total tribal incompetent named Glork, decided to pass the time by seeing how long they could hold their breath. Gambar's competitor had a much stronger will than Gambar. Glork held his breath until he thought he had killed himself.
In that one moment of stupendous obstinancy, Glork reached his full potential with his discovery that death was nothing to fear.
Unfortunately for Glork (but fortunately for his descendants who went on to become politicians)his involuntary respiration system kicked in and forced him to breathe after he had blacked out.
Thus literature arrived at its first anti-climax.
Even the apparent death of his competitor didn't stop Gambar from holding his breath. When Glork returned to his senses, the first sensation he experienced along with his surprised inhale was Gambar's massive exhale.
Glork mistook Gambar's exhale as a sigh of relief and thought he had made a friend.
Gambar was amazed that he had won at something.
The two outcasts shared a moment of illusional ecstacy.
Then they got up and started standing around again. Glork thinking he had a friend. Gambar thinking he had a future.
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