Just Another Shocking Diagnosis and Solution

I was just sitting around yesterday when I got a call from my "daughter" Mary. Mary was on her way to Taco Tuesday in Boston with her friend Zooey. This is when I got a shocking new diagnosis.

Mary had been at a party the weekend before in the city. There were maybe fifty folks at the party. She was just standing around trying to feel at home. The friend that had invited her to the party was predisposed with being the host of the get together. Mary understood this responsibility. Still, she was basically alone and unescorted.

She had several odd conversations especially with a guy named Joe. Later, Joe went to the host of the party and described Mary to the host as "cool but cis". When Mary had a subsequent conversation with the host, he divulged that several other party goers had asserted similarly. They were not cis.

Mary knew she was cool but she didn't know she was cis. Hey take a compliment when you get one even if there is a negging edge to it.

I asked her what the hell "cis" was?

She said she didn't know but at the party one of the main themes was gender identification. Once again at this party, a minority had become a majority. There was surely something happening here but Mary wasn't quite sure what it was and  I'm just another Mr. Jones trying to know best.

Here is the wikipedia short definition of cis.

Cisgender (often abbreviated to simply cis) is a term for people whose gender identity matches the sex that they were assigned at birth. Cisgender may also be defined as those who have "a gender identity or perform a gender role society considers appropriate for one's sex".[1] It is the opposite of the term transgender.[2]

Back in the primitive, insensitive days of Old Soho boys would be girls and girls would be boys in a mixed up, muddled up, shook up world except for Lola. I understood that then but this is something different. This is the final frontier.

I realized that I too was cis.

So was Mary's Mom.

Oh My God, cancer and now this!

I could feel all the accepted gender matching that was done at my birth rallying to defend itself in the usual, chauvinistic, self-centered, ego-driven way. I realized quickly that I was a born a man and had all the trappings. My three main concerns were in fact 1) when do I get paid 2) where's my beer and 3) what's the score in the ballgame.

I'm cis just like my daughter and unlike the majority of them at the party.

I was pondering this differentiation when I went to bed last night.

When I woke up, I was "shocked" to see that Donald Trump had decided to ban all transgenders from military service.

Wow.

1300 less.

0.55%

Meanwhile, we face a much more substantial problem and it involves the cis population.

Tests are revealing that football is for sure an activity that scrambles brains. The evidence is undeniable based on the examination of brains taken from the cadavers of ex-football players at all levels.

Some folks say, so what? Those guys know the risk and they get well rewarded for taking that risk.

That's what being cis is all about when it comes to over aggressive, physically gifted, emotionally deprived masculine identified missiles.

The moral problem is an interesting one to all of those misguided missiles but the bigger moral problem belongs to the rest of us.

Should we continue to support the televised spectacle that we know is akin to watching cis males literally beating the brains out of one another for our enjoyment and betting pleasure.

Who needs Nero when we got Goodell and network teevee.

There's got to be a solution somewhere.

How about if we ban cis males from football and offer the opportunity to the transgendered population who can no longer join the military.

The numbers fit.

And we can replace the missing 1300 in the military with the pissed off cis who are no longer allowed in the NFL because they made the whole thing too brutal and insensitive. Turn them loose on ISIS.

Meanwhile, the transgendered might very well play a more highly evolved game with fewer injuries and much more interesting uniforms or perhaps no uniforms what so ever. There might even be a drastic reduction in the rules which nobody understands anyways.

Voila.

The military improves.

The NFL improves.

America adjusts

Just sayn'