New Health Kick

I'm on a new health kick. I'm gonna kick back on my reading.

I read while reclining on my couch, holding my head up with my right hand. I keep my elbow at ninety degrees which keeps it in shape for beer drinking but encourages the affliction known as couch arm while simultaneously creating indomitably complex cowlicks in the side of my hair on my palm indented noggin.

I read each night until I fall asleep. I wake up, work on my photography and writing, eat breakfast, take a walk, grab a shower and head up to the mancave where I being reading again. If I'm gonna keep writing, I've got to keep reading.

I come down, argue with the wife, eat a huge dinner, watch the news on teevee, start to read again until it's time for bed.

Consequently, I spend about 20 out of 24 hours a day/night in the reclining position. 

I'm going to reduce that by watching more teevee. I sit up when I watch teevee. Sitting up burns more calories than lying down. I know the difference is miniscule but hey, I've got to start somewhere.

Also the less I read, the smarter I will feel.

Reading makes me realize how little I know about everything. It increases my desire to know more which in turn convinces me that I know less. I'm not happy unless I got at least five books going at the same time and even then, I'm not "happy" but I am absorbing.

Currently I'm reading about pugilistica dementia, RNA decoding, the lives of Oliver Cromwell and Joan of Arc, history of the Jesuits, the potato famine in Ireland and the emerging influence of cancel culture.

Here's just one example of something that I learned that I didn't know and how it leads to other things that I needed to find out about.

I always thought that Thomas Cromwell and Oliver Cromwell were the same guy. I had no idea that a British King had been executed and that the kingdom had become a commonwealth for awhile and that eventually Oliver Cromwell's body was exhumed, executed after death and his head placed on a pike for the next 20 years and that the head on the pike might not even had been his head and that the head of whomever than went missing for centuries.

And that head, like everybody else in this story was made of RNA which nobody knew about until today which we know about but don't understand and don't have the time for somebody like Barry Scheck to explain it all to us because we already know whose guilty and who isn't etc.

Oliver Cromwell was the guy who enabled the execution the king whereas Thomas Cromwell was executed by a King who was a distant relative of the King that Cromwell dethroned. Oliver persecuted Catholics in Ireland and the Jesuits came to Ireland in order to resist Cromwell which increased the smoldering religious based tension between Ireland and England until the potato famine of 1846 in which blight caused starvation among the Irish people who got no help from the British who would just as soon those A holes disappeared so they could seize their lands and if they didn't starve they could be sent to America which they were although 20% didn't survive the voyage over on the filthy, overcrowded ships and when they got here they found out that they weren't wanted here either so they traded in starvation at home for starvation here which set a standard of bias against them for the next 50 years some of which exists still today. That's why many Irishmen became prize fighters and got their brains beat in trying to make enough money to eat.

Oh and Joan of Arc was burned as a cross dressing witch and was condemned and excommuicated as a nutjob until a subsequent rehabilitation trial cleared her of her "crimes" and a few hundred years later, the Church put out the ultimate "Whoops" when it declared that not only was Joan not a criminal or a nut, she was a freakin' saint.

After finding all this out, I couldn't believe that I had gone my whole life knowing so little and how stupid I had been until last week and realizing that I need to know more about everything cuz I know virtually nothing about anything so I better start reading again which means more time reclining on the couch and further damage to my drinking shoulder and my hair so that I can be more prepared for the big revral at the end.

Therefore, I'm gonna cut down on reading by watching more teevee. Teevee gives me the illusion that I know more than I know and prepares me for pointless arguments with other teevee informed folks. We feel so secure in our opinions because we got them from a talking head on teevee who got his/her opinions from somebody else who figured out a way to make the teevee viewers feel smart enough to buy the products that are adverised on his/her network.

So, I'm going to go upstairs and work out by watching the NFL all day today and keep track of the bets that I made in which I currently bet the underdogs and take the point spread because that enables me to sometimes win when I'm losing which is a small relief from continually losing while I'm losing or even worse losing when I'm winning.

Then downstairs for a plate of spaghetti and meatballs.

N'ome sayn?