Rocking the Oscars

For the first time in 67 years, I chose not to watch the Oscars last night.

Instead, we watched a low budget moivie called Windfall that was very good.

After Windfall, it was past my bedtime so I hit the hay. Before hitting the hay, I suggested we turn over to the Oscars for a moment and catch an award or a performance. We caught the song that won Best Song. I wasn't real impressed. I started for the bedroom when I noticed that Chris Rock was going to be the next presenter. I've never cared much for Chris Rock...I much prefer The Rock. He's much funnier. If ya smell what I'm cooking.

I read for a few minutes before falling asleep.

While in that twilight between sleep and dreams, Lynn entered the room and told me something about Will Smith slugging Chris Rock over a comment that Rock made about Will's wife. Her description sounded so surreal that I thought, "yes, I am asleep". Next thing I knew I was asleep because I was dreaming.

A few hours later, I looked at the clock and it was 6:38. Lynn was already out of bed. I picked up my kindle and started re-reading Fill Fuller. At 8 o'clock, Lynn came back into the room and described again the incident between Rock and Smith which convinced me that I was either still asleep or what she had told me the night before had actually happened.

It happened.

I've watched the incident several times already and it's still barely noon. This thing is blowing up the internet as well it should. What the hell are we to make of such a foolish fiasco. Everybody's taking sides. I know a pentagon has ten sides but this incident has that and more. Let's dive into four of them of them for starters.

1) Men defending women. How many times has this happened in barroms across the world. How many lives have been lost? Is it chivalry or machissimo. Do women instigate this shit or are men out of line? For many women, the idea of a man sticking up for her is a dream come true and a sign of love. Women have got to check their motives at the door because God knows men are immature enough to explode at any time into self-righteous "what did you say about my wife" fury. Some people claim that war itself is the masculine payback in bloodletting for the bloodshed of menstruation. Everbody bleeds.

2) Comedy. Hey can't ya take a joke? Hey you gonna come to my roast where my friends tear me apart and we all laugh as we camouflage our anger with the mask of good humor. Have you ever been to a comedy club where the "comic" is making "fun" of everybody and since he/she/they include self-deprecation in their "act", we're all supposed to go along with the good natured stereotyping/bullying being conducted by the "entertainer" on the stage armed with his/her/their microphone who is egging on the "audience" and encouraging peer pressure to make "fun" of someone else who is too often a member of the "audience" but is really just a prop in the tasteless savagery. I remember the last time that I was trapped in a comedy club and I do mean the last time. We wouldn't have gone in the first place but we had "won a raffle" which included a reserve seat right upfront. After a few minutes, it became clear to me that we were in the "target" seat as a consequence of our "winning" The asshole comedian had us in his sights. I mustered all of my fury and self control into a mask that read "don't even think about making 'fun' of us as we're not having any fun laughing at your continual f bombs. I had to keep it under tight control because these assholes are hoping to get us engaged so that they can use our reaction to "react" to us. It's all part of the act and the act of the insult comedian improves when somebody gets pissed off and a back and forth "heckle" begins for which the "comic" is well prepared after a lifetime of such bullshit on and off the stage. I must have succeeded in my vibe because the "comic" left us alone except for one mention when he said "and I'm not gonna mess with THAT guy over there" meaning me. If he had messed with me, I wouldn't have charged the stage. I would have left the desperate performance and asked for a refund on my way out. What if he/she/they had started in on my wife? Does that demand a change in my strategy? What if my wife started good naturedly going along with the comic, would she have told me to "sit my ass down" in order to prevent further embarrassment? I just asked Lynn what she would have done in that circumstance and she said that "yes" she probably would have told me to sit my ass down. What would I have done? I probably would have sat my ass down because I'm gonna lose either way. Did Smith's wife have the opportunity to tell her husband to "sit his ass down" and if she did have that opportunity and didn't tell him to "sit his ass down." are we back to the first problem of "rescue me...kick his ass".

Maybe this all goes back to Don Rickles and his career as an insult comedian. Everybody swears that Rickles was gentleman outside of his "act" and was known for being a momma's boy in that he was good son with high regard for his mother and his wife. Kinda wished he hadn't got this particual ball rolling. 

3) The Academy Awards Themselves. Some folks contend that the celebrities come into the event with a tremendous amount of pressure. Jada Smith had spent hours and hundreds of thousands of dollars on her appearance and wardrobe, she was bound to be touchy about the subject and had probably been hell on wheels "around the house" getting ready for the event and had been driving her husband crazy while she prepared. All the guys have to do is throw on a tux but the women are in big time, stressful competition about who looks the best, which designer did the best job, who spent the most, whose hair (or in this case non-hair) is most in synch with whatever current trend they are setting, whose wearing the most jewels, who will be "graded" on all of this rigamarole and Bjorked if they dare to show up in a swan suit. Why have we let it get this far? Who are these people that we adore and emulate? Why should we care about the awards that they invent and bestow upon each other while the rest of us freak out about the cost of milk and movies themselves become teevee shows and nobody goes to the theater anymore.

4) Race. What is the same thing had occurred only with Leonardo or Keanu charging the stage. The Academy took great pride in announcing that for the first time, the show was being produced by blacks rather than whites. Is that a big deal. Is that why one black guy went after another black guy? In America we always come down to race one way or another, this fiasco was another. What do we make of it. Nothing? Something? It's already too late for nothing so what the hell is this something saying about everything or anything.

Yeah we need a lot of changes in this country from our understanding of feminism and masculinity to the savagery of our comedy to the superficiality of our appearances and our ongoing development beyond our national orignal sin of slavery and discrimination

Lotta shit to talk about.

Unless or even if this whole shebang was in fact a foolish dream. 

I'm gonna go upstairs now and take a look at the videotape