The Retreat

By MistakenMagic
Wed, 30 Jan 2013
- 2393 reads
15 comments
Under an assault of slender-arrowed rain,
the snow has retreated from this beach of stone
like a wave on yearly tide.
The wedding-white shroud
has been pulled away to reveal
this green reincarnation.
The stray corpse of a snowman
sinks into the mud. The rain has stolen
his face and a testimony melts in his mouth,
dribbling onto the grass like blood.
But what was there to leave?
I cannot grieve for their dead.
The sky is colourless in surrender,
and I find unclaimed continents of ice
in the car park; spoils, loot.
Students trickle between these masses
like water. There is one solid cloud-mound
in my path and I plant my boot in it like a flag.
- Log in to post comments
Comments
Memories of the snow that
Permalink Submitted by skinner_jennifer on
Memories of the snow that once was, but now long
gone and forgotton. But here in your poem Magic,
you've captured the essence of what it was, and is
now.
That last stanza sums it up nicely.
Students trickle between these masses
like water. There is one solid cloud-mound
in my path and I plant my boot in it like a flag.
Really enjoyed reading.
Jenny. xxx
- Log in to post comments
Briggs never told it like
Briggs never told it like this, brilliantly written.
- Log in to post comments
Melting snow is grim Magic-
Melting snow is grim Magic- you captured the atmosphere of it I think.
;)Pia
- Log in to post comments
Another gem, Magic, from the
Permalink Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
Another gem, Magic, from the first stunning stanza to the last. Loved the poem's structure too, which suits it so well. Deserves a bowlfull of cherries, indeed;-)
Tina xxx
- Log in to post comments
Bloody brilliant I think we
Bloody brilliant
I think we ought to mourn their dead!
- Log in to post comments
If you keep writing as you
If you keep writing as you do you will never fall flat on your face magic. It's all good.
- Log in to post comments
It's all been said...but
Permalink Submitted by threeleafshamrock on
It's all been said...but that doesn't make it any less brilliant. Well done
Chris ;)
- Log in to post comments