Well Then Nothing

A kitchen announced itself at the end of the hallway with rows of avocado green cabinets, ill-matched tableware, and a large butcher-block counter in the middle.  Odours varied, but above everything else there was evidently a great battle for sensory domination going on between cranberry and mushroom.  At the counter, ALCOHOLIC and RUNAWAY 2 were sitting on high stools eating slices of brown bread with generous coatings of cranberry sauce.  A jar sat next to them and a spattered knife on a plate.  A pot of mushroom soup was going cold on the hob, abandoned, but it was winning the war, drenching the room in a thick and unpleasant aroma as if out of spite, a disquieting reminder to all cranberry-eaters. 

ALCOHOLIC: What would you be doing now if you weren’t here?

RUNAWAY 2: I don’t really know.

ALCOHOLIC: What I mean is: what would you be doing in class?  You’re a student, aren’t you?

RUNAWAY 2: There would be no class now.  We finish early on a Friday.

ALCOHOLIC: Oh, that’s well for yous.  What time?

RUNAWAY 2: Twelve.  Or is it one?  I really can’t remember.  Early enough.

ALCOHOLIC:  That’s good.  I never went and done all that myself.  But I wish I had.

RUNAWAY 2: Well, I wouldn’t worry so much.  It’s not all it’s cracked up to be.

ALCOHOLIC: How do the professors square up against him in there?

RUNAWAY 2:  He has a better way about him.  I don’t feel bombarded when he speaks.  There are times when he is less clear in what he is saying but I don’t mind so much because he has our well-being in mind which I never felt any of the professors had.  Well-being is high up on my list.  And it feels closer to possible with the detraditionalising we do here – plus the demerging and denaming and deegotising and depoliticising...and all the rest.

ALCOHOLIC: Wait.  Isn’t it Thursday today?

RUNAWAY 2: Thursday?  I thought it was Friday. 

ALCOHOLIC: Jesus, sure isn’t your memory as bad as mine.

RUNAWAY 2: Anyway, do you want some of the cranberry juice?

ALCOHOLIC: (with contrived excitement) Oh, I’d love some of that.

RUNAWAY 2: (while going to the fridge) I get your sarcasm.  I get it more than the others.

ALCOHOLIC:  It’s the one thing that didn’t die.  I lost my son, my wife, my job, but not the sarcasm.  It stuck with me through it all like my only true friend in the world.  Because it knew deep down it was going to have just a mighty fine time of it, even if I was on the verge of topping myself.

Two glasses of fresh cranberry juice later:

RUNAWAY 2: On the question of depoliticising...it’s harder than I thought it would be.  I kind of know what your one back there was on about. 

ALCOHOLIC: It’s no sweat at all for me.  Politics were always mumbo-jumbo as far as I was concerned so there’s nothing there to wipe.

RUNAWAY 2:  You mean you’ve never had strong views on anything?

ALCOHOLIC:  Not a one.

RUNAWAY 2:  I don’t believe that now.

ALCOHOLIC:  I suppose it depends what you mean by views.  If you asked me for my views on the labour unions, I’d say fine, I’m alright with them being there.  But if you’re talking about the rights of the worker, and all the ins and outs of that, sure I never gave a crap.  I was fine as long as they paid me something.

RUNAWAY 2: And what if they didn’t pay you?

ALCOHOLIC: But sure they always did, didn’t they?

RUNAWAY 2:  Well, I’m finding it difficult.  I have strong views on a few things.

ALCOHOLIC:  They couldn’t be that strong.  Aren’t you only a wee girl?

RUNAWAY 2:  I’m twenty.  And taller than you.

ALCOHOLIC: Sure I’ve a son of fifteen who towers over me but he’s not exactly canvassing out on the streets every day.

RUNAWAY 2: I bet you would have ended up political if you’d went to college.  I think I got more political about things after only a few weeks being there.  They were all at it.  It rubs off on you, you know.

ALCOHOLIC:  That may be.   I’m not saying I wouldn’t ever go in for a bit of politics.  Just in my experience there was never much call for it.  And it’s too late now.  Soon there’ll be permanent stoppers inside all our heads to null and void all that stuff.  Which is fine by me.  I need all the stoppers I can get.  Apparently.  Though you seem to be suspicious about the whole thing.

RUNAWAY 2:  Oh no.  If depoliticising will aid me in the pursuit of well-being, I’ll walk that line.  It’s just hard, that’s all.

ALCOHOLIC looked over curiously at the stranded pot of mushroom soup.  He was beginning to be won over.   

RUNAWAY 2: Metaphysics!

ALCOHOLIC: What?

RUNAWAY 2: I just remembered.  That’s what we’d be doing right now. In class. Metaphysics on a Thursday afternoon.

ALCOHOLIC:  Metaphysics?  Jesus Christ Almighty!  Wait.  You know, I think it is Friday today.  I think you were right the first time.

RUNAWAY 2:  Well then.  Nothing.