Education for Leisure

Today I am going to kill something. I don't care what I am going to
kill; it could be anything. Anything that I see, like the person in
front of me.

I have had enough of being ignored all the time, I was ignored
yesterday, last week, last month, last year, and I was ignored today. I
will be ignored tomorrow, next week, next month and next year, just
like today.

It is an ordinary day today. The sky seems to be grey, with tears of
rain pouring down so hard; you could barely look up without hurting
your eyes. But I don't care. It's too quiet and dull; everyone is
running in doors, hiding from the rain. I could feel some sort of
boredom stirring in every corner of the street along with the rain.
It's a grey and ordinary day again today. But I'm going to make a
change. Today, I'm going to play God.

I walked further down the lonely street, staring down onto the grey
pavements, as they started to flood. A piece of paper on the floor
caught my attention. I tried reading it but it wasn't clear. The only
words that still remained visible, was William Shakespeare. Everyone
appreciated him all the time. I don't know why.

We did Shakespeare at school today. It didn't make much sense at all;
it was like the characters were speaking another language I couldn't
understand. I was sitting at the far back corner of the room next to
the window, scribbling my talent onto the table, chair, book and
window.

The class took notes. I didn't, but no one noticed. I thought about
how God punishes people; make us feel like helpless flies. It made me
laugh, but no one seemed to hear.

A fly flew next to me onto the table. The fly ignored me, like the
whole classroom. They were dull, like the once white but now grey
walls, covered with all the darkness and sadness you could possibly
find.

The fly was still on the same spot, ignoring me. It ignored me as I
lifted my thumb, and ignored me as I squashed it down. As I lifted my
thumb back up, I could see it's greenish blood, it's broken wings and I
guess, a leg or so. If felt so fun, that I could do it again to
anything.

I looked around for a new victim, but the bell rang. So I breathed my
last talent onto the window and walked out into the pouring rain.

The rain slows a little, but it's still dull and grey. The street is
quiet as well; hardly anything is around. All the curtains in the
houses around me were drawn shut, like they were hiding from something.
But there is no one around to hide from. I hate it when everything is
quiet.

I turned a corner. I could see many more people here than the street I
came from. But they all seemed dull and boring, doing their usual
stuff, coming from work, and going home to their family. They again
ignored me like always. I was invisible to them again, as I tried
handing out my autograph.

Once every fortnight, I would walk two miles into town, signing my
autograph. But no one appreciates my autograph. Like today. They ignore
me again.

People say that I'm not clever, not clever at all, opposite to a
genius. But they are wrong. I'm more then what they think.

I'm a genius. I am more clever then anyone you could think of. I even
can be anything, anything at all, anything I set my mind to; if I was
given the chance. No one gave me the chance to be anything. They didn't
even notice how bright I am. They cut me off, left me aside and
forgotten, like a dying dull plant. But I am going to change all of
this.

I see a cat approaching me, slowly, out of nowhere. It was a dark
coloured cat; it's so hard to tell in this type of rain what it exactly
looked like.

The cat's bright eyes were fixed onto me, onto my thumb, the fly still
noticeable, but really hard to understand. The cat didn't come towards
me; instead, it started to walk away, trying to avoid me. It knows I'm
too clever for him. I look back at my thumb. I could feel a smile
growing across my face.

By the time I approached my house's door hours had passed. I didn't
have any idea of the time, but it felt like that I'd been outside in
the lonely street too long.

I crept through the sitting room. The budgie hid itself under it's
wing, at the far corner of the cage. Not far away from the cage, the
goldfish was in the bowl, enjoying itself, unbothered by life, unlike
me; it seemed to be laughing at me. It didn't please me at all. And I
hated it. The goldfish was swimming madly in the bowl, but not for
long.

I went up the stairs, holding the bowl with the fish inside it, who
seemed to know what was going through my mind right now. I went into
the bathroom, I poured the goldfish down the bog and pull the chain, to
make sure it wouldn't survive. I started to feel good, and it was fun.
I wanted to do it again, to anything, anything that I see. I went
downstairs and stared at the budgie - it started to panic.

It's boring and quiet. There is nothing left to kill. I used to have a
cat, but it went missing weeks ago. Lost, I guess, or even run over by
a truck.

I went towards the phone. I was bored; I wanted to phone someone, but
who? I thought deeply about who to call. I decided to dial the radio
station.

It takes too long for someone to answer the phone. I've been waiting
for a long time. At last someone answers. The man asks who I am. I tell
him he is talking to a famous person, a superstar. He cuts me off. Like
everyone else he cuts me off again.

I went into the dark kitchen and started to look through every single
drawer. I've had enough. It was time I made a change. I searched and
searched, until, I found it. It was so shiny, and glittering in my
eyes. I felt the smile growing back across my face. It was like I had
all the power in my hand. I get a firm grip of our bread-knife, and go
outside. It was no longer raining and the sun was greeting me. The
pavements below me were glittering. I turned towards the lonely street
I came from. I walk back down the street, still holding the wondrous
power. Suddenly. I touch your arm?