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Soliloquy in Yellow

Posted by dilletante on March 13, 2009 - 15:05
from the ABC set 2007-2008

we sit in the kitchen, conversing
in a light sort of fashion
over our petit déjeuner,
eyeballing the cracks
in the freshly whitewashed walls.

the sun leaves fingermarks
on the tablecloth and i imagine
our hands perform a shadow play.

you talk of your lovers
and the constant demands,
and how you'd love to buy yourself
a little boat and travel the world.
you'd write about your adventures
and, who knows, you say,
you could be the next Hemingway.

i smile and sip my sugary tea,
bitterly biting my underlip
while your gaze drifts away.

you lick the smoke
from your cigarette and grin;
your musings are an abstract to me.
my feelings show through
the worn-out coating
like a pentimento.

you call me sentimental,
we laugh out loud, and i offer you
more croissants and coffee cream.

inside, it leaves me feeling
like an overripe apricot
in which you keep
sticking your fingers,
trying to get the pit out.

you think i'm quite ordinary.
that's a good thing, you say,
being in the spotlight is such a drag.
my heart is an ashtray;
heedlessly you stub your cigarettes
into its sore flesh.

i should've known
you were cold-hearted
the moment i first touched
your hand and it felt
nearly bloodless.

pass the apples,
you ask absentmindedly,
and i oblige, left in my limbo
to count the cuts and smile
at your remarks.

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Comments

Silver Spun Sand | March 13, 2009 - 18:36

One of the best poems I have read in quite a while. An enviably excellent write.

I think we can all see ourselves or someone we know in one, or maybe more, of the stanzas.

This one, in particular, hit a chord with me.

"you talk of your lovers
and the constant demands,
and how you'd love to buy yourself
a little boat and travel the world.
you'd write about your adventures
and, who knows, you say,
you could be the next Hemingway."

More than deserving of its cherry.

Tina

a.jay | March 13, 2009 - 20:08

i agree with tina, but my fave has gotta be the apricot.
chilling and terribly familiar, bravo :)
a x

Dynamaso | March 13, 2009 - 22:25

There is so much to like about this, I don't know where to start. Of all the imagery in this, I particularly like:

"the sun leaves fingermarks
on the tablecloth and i imagine
our hands perform a shadow play."

An absolutely wonderful read. Thank you.

dilletante | March 14, 2009 - 01:29

Thank you guys for all the positive comments.
They're much appreciated!

Tanja

Ween | March 14, 2009 - 18:53

"you lick the smoke
from your cigarette and grin"

i think thats a wonderful line.And a really cool poem.

dilletante | March 15, 2009 - 02:51

Thanks Ween.
I must say I didn't expect this piece to get such positive reactions.
(Or even get cherrypicked.)

MistakenMagic | March 20, 2009 - 21:24

This image is just breath-taking;

'the sun leaves fingermarks
on the tablecloth and i imagine
our hands perform a shadow play.'

and

'my heart is an ashtray;
heedlessly you stub your cigarettes
into its sore flesh.'

Brilliant, brilliant poem ;)

Magic xxx

dilletante | March 21, 2009 - 01:17

Thank you Rebecca.

Nathan Bednarek | March 22, 2009 - 09:22

A well deserved cherry and poem of the week! This is amazing.

Well done.

Nathan.

dilletante | March 31, 2009 - 01:34

Thanks Nathan.

wandelaar | December 19, 2009 - 13:35

I agree with everything said here, amazing!

JoseHdz | September 29, 2010 - 04:14

Great energy. Favorite lines: 'heart is an ashtray' and the entire last stanza.. Thank_you..

Cheers